We all aspire to find a partner for keeps. At some point in our lives, we learn to fall in love with someone who completes us, someone who complements and tolerates us in different ways and aspects.
And we do this by going on dates.
However, we don’t always strike gold when dating, and oftentimes we end up frustrated with having to waste time, effort and to some extent, emotions, over someone we are not compatible with at all. And sometimes, we wish that we just stumble upon the right person and live happily ever after.
But how exactly do you know if you’re dating the right person? You may not notice it but the person you are currently dating is the right one for you. Not seeing their qualities right away may lead you to miss out on a lot of wonderful things in the future, and this is the last thing you’d ever want to experience. So yes, here are 11 ways that may help in seeing whether the person you are dating is the one for you:
1. You tolerate each other’s interests.
You sometimes find a person who matches your interests, but this doesn’t guarantee that you two won’t clash later on. However, an indicator that you are dating the right person is when while you do not share each other’s interests, you both are able to tolerate these things and activities. You also feel open to trying each other’s hobbies and activities for the sole sake of experience and not because you are trying to fit in.
2. They listen to your whims.
Another sign that you are dating the right person is when he or she listens actively to your stories and whims. There are instances when you need to voice out your feelings, and not everyone has the patience to listen to you. But when this person you are dating makes time and exerts the effort to hear you out without being judgmental or giving unsolicited, unwanted advice, then he or she is definitely for keeps.
3. They like and value you as you are.
When dating someone, you always put your best foot forward. It takes time before you feel comfortable with each other’s personalities and characters. But there is always this person who likes and values you as you are, and doesn’t make you feel obligated to change. Rather, this person serves as your inspiration to become a better human being. If you happen to be dating such a person, then you may want to consider whether to take your setup to the next level.
4. You don’t try to change them.
There are also times when while you enjoy the company of the person you are dating, you are also looking for areas of improvement. This is actually a red flag because when you want the person to change, you are not seeing his or her qualities; instead, you are trying to mold them into your own vision of a perfect partner. That is not how you love a person, and maybe, this individual isn’t the one for you.
5. They’re happier when you are happy.
There are people who easily get jealous when their partners are achieving success in life. If the person you are dating happens to gloat at you or pull you down whenever accomplish something or feel good over a particular feat, then that raises another red flag. Your life partner should be someone who recognizes your success and is even happier whenever you succeed-and not put their own wellbeing in the way of your happiness.
6. They don’t hold you back.
Aside from recognizing and valuing your success, the right person is someone who doesn’t hold you back whenever you are trying to reach for your aspirations. In fact, they should be the first ones to support you in achieving your goals, even if it means that their happiness would be put aside.
The ideal partner allows you not only to be in your comfort zone but more importantly pushes you to get out of it and explore life as a whole.
7. You both find it easier to adjust to each other’s lives.
The person you are dating may be the right one for you when you two do not find it difficult to adjust in each other’s way of life. You both tolerate each other’s pet peeves, or the way you eat, sleep and do simple tasks even if these are different from their own. You also learn to appreciate the way you do things without feeling coerced or obligated by the fact that you are dating.
8. You both are excited to be with each other.
This may sound petty and very childish, but even adults feel butterflies in their stomach whenever they are feeling some sort of romantic excitement. You do not always get to feel this with the person you are dating, but if you happen to be hanging out with someone who shares the same feeling of excitement whenever you see each other, then that’s a sign not only of compatibility but also of the yearning to enjoy life together.
9. You fit into each other’s social environments.
You may be dating someone now, but does this person sit well with your family and friends? And do you sit well with theirs? Your respective social environments play a big role in determining whether this person you are dating is right for you, mainly because they only want the best for you.
If your significant other happens to pass the standards of your family friends and vice versa, then most likely you two are meant to be.
10. You both find the moment to reflect and pray.
God is the center of every relationship, and you must remember that. If your partner likewise happens to think the same way and even encourages you to take the time off for you to pray together, then this is a good sign that you two are for keeps. At the very least, your partner should be able to respect your faith and beliefs, and at the same time remind you the value your faith at all times.
11. They pass the notorious “bar test.”
Lastly, the person you are dating may be the right one for you when he or she passes the notorious “bar test.” This is when you two are in a public place, such as a bar or a restaurant, and you no longer look at someone else (and he or she isn’t looking at anyone else either).
Passing the bar test means that you two are content with each other, and are no longer for something different or something more. And yes, once you two achieve that feeling of contentment, then what you have together is already worth fighting for.
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