Worrying about talking too much? It can be hard to detect while speaking, so you need to take a moment to reflect. If you’re considering it, then you may be speaking too much. Sounds simple, right?
Having a lot to say is great, but social norms exist regarding communication skills. Being overly talkative and interrupting others isn’t normal. Don’t be known as the one who speaks too much, often about unimportant topics.
If you want to find out if you talk too much so you can start changing your behavior, check out the following signs:
How You Behave
1. You Frequently Offer Advice Or Corrections To Others.
Giving advice is fine, but you tend to do it for everything, regardless of whether you are an expert on the topic or not. You want to impress others with your knowledge, but this habit of constantly correcting others without knowing if they even want your advice is a sign of excessive talking. You are more focused on speaking than on listening.
2. You Can Talk Extensively About Any Topic.
A talkative person knows a lot about many things, but that’s not always a good thing. People may not see you as trustworthy if you form opinions and give speeches based on quick assumptions and limited information.
3. You Have A Tendency To Include Extra, Unimportant Details In Your Stories.
You tend to include extraneous information when recounting stories, even if it is irrelevant to the main point. This makes the story longer and drags on rather than getting to the point quickly.
4. You Keep Talking About The Same Topic.
Talking about the same subjects is a habit of those who speak excessively. You may not be aware of this; if someone has pointed it out to you, consider yourself lucky. This repetition frequently occurs among those who talk too much around their friends, as they get so excited about the story they want to share that they forget they have already told it.
5. You Often Get Into Conflict.
You are more likely to get into conflict as you dominate conversations, rarely allowing others to speak. You may also talk about sensitive or controversial topics without considering the feelings of others. Additionally, your constant talking may come across as annoying or disruptive to others, leading to strained relationships and potential conflicts. By not being able to listen effectively and constantly talking, you create a high risk of misunderstandings and disagreements in your interactions with others.
6. You Can’t Help But Spill The Beans.
Your reputation for being unreliable with secrets results from your tendency to talk too much. You may unintentionally reveal secrets without realizing their confidential nature or simply because you don’t want to run out of things to say.
How You Feel
7. You Desire To Be Well-Liked.
You may not be aware, but you desire to be liked by others. You want to come across as friendly and approachable. You may think that you speak the way you do or talk for as long as you do for the benefit of your listeners, but in reality, it’s either because you can’t help it or simply because you enjoy speaking a lot.
8. You Think You Are Always Misunderstood.
When you talk too much, it’s easy to get misunderstood. Your friends may hear what you’re saying, but they may not be able to understand the context or your intent. As a result, they may misinterpret your words and actions, leading to confusion and misunderstandings. It’s essential to be mindful of how you communicate and to make an effort to be clear and concise in your speech, to avoid being misunderstood.
9. You Can Feel Others Get Bored Listening To You.
Imagine you’re in a situation where the other person is talking too much. Not only are they likely to express their true feelings as they are not holding back, but they are likely talking significantly more than you. You may only be nodding your head and giving short 2-5 word responses, which may also be a symptom of social anxiety. It can be challenging to exit such a conversation, especially when the other person is talking so much that it’s difficult to end the conversation politely without appearing rude, restless, or disinterested.
10. Your View Is Not Echoed By Others.
You can’t find common ground with someone on any topic. Your views differ, which could be due to your unique perspective shaped by your own experiences. However, it’s possible that your perspective is subjective and not influenced by external factors, causing disagreement.
11. You Find It Difficult To Build Friendships.
It’s hard for you to make new friends and keep them because you talk too much and don’t allow others to speak. You are primarily friends with people you’ve known for a while and those who are always around you, like co-workers. But making a close connection with a complete stranger is rare for you.
How Others React
12. Your Friends Usually Don’t Pick Up Your Calls.
Some of your friends may not answer your calls, then later text back saying they were busy or didn’t see the call. However, if you call back, they still may not answer. This avoidance may be due to the expectation of excessive talking on your part, taking up too much of their time, or they simply have something more important to do.
13. You Are Cut Off By Others Without Hesitation.
People interrupt or end conversations with you without hesitation, as you tend to consume their time with lengthy talks about uninteresting topics or leave them feeling drained. This is a sign that your excessive talking does not resonate with them. To avoid this, it’s important to make conversations two-sided and ensure the other person feels heard. Otherwise, you may risk losing their interest and future interactions.
14. You Get Asked If What You’ll Say Is Long.
Yes, people who talk too much are often asked if the story they’re about to share is long. Friends aware of this tendency will pre-emptively ask to avoid being stuck in a lengthy conversation.
15. You Notice People Leave When You Join a Group, Or You Start Talking.
People leaving when you start talking indicates that you talk too much. This could be due to various reasons, such as talking about unimportant things, taking up too much of their time, or making them feel exhausted after every conversation. To avoid this situation, it’s important to keep conversations two-sided and ensure that the people you talk to feel heard.
16. You Observe People Spacing Out When You Talk.
Your friends zoning out or losing interest when you speak could signify that they expect a lengthy or unengaging conversation, but you persist in speaking nonetheless. You seek out those who still seem attentive and continue speaking despite others losing interest.
Desire To Change
Learning to control yourself from talking too much can be challenging, but it is an important skill to maintain healthy relationships with others.
One technique is to actively listen to others in conversations and give them a chance to speak. Another way is to pause and reflect before responding, allowing yourself to think about what you want to say and how much you want to say. Setting personal talking limits, such as only speaking for a certain amount of time in a group setting, can also be helpful. Practicing mindfulness and being aware of your own behavior can also lead to better self-regulation.
With consistent effort and practice, controlling the urge to talk too much can become a habit and lead to more fulfilling relationships with those around you.
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