For most of us, our arguments fade away into time and we lose the intensity and hurt we felt around them. But, sometimes there is one argument that won’t dissolve away. It feels like it just happened, and it can affect our mood, relationships, and the present moment in a big way. There is no point in holding onto that argument anymore. It’s time to let it go and move on. The following affirmations can help you do that.
1. I’m Not Scared Of Confrontation
First and foremost, affirm to yourself that you are not scared of confrontation. Why? Because you may need to confront the person you had the argument with in order to let it go. Especially if you want to maintain a relationship with them.
If there are unresolved issues, then you need to talk it out. By talking it out, things can get straightened out and you can feel better about everything and let that argument dissolve away.
Sometimes the person you had the argument with has already let it go, so if you are mad, you are mad alone. That does you no good. Why would you put that on yourself? Get up, confront the person and let them know how you feel, and find a way to work things out or, at the very least, come to an agreement that you are never going to agree and that’s fine.
2. I Live In The Present Moment
You can’t live in the past, but if you are unable to let go of something, then that’s exactly what you are trying to do.
But, it’s impossible.
You can’t go back to the past and change anything.
Keeping your thoughts and energy in the past isn’t going to do anything to make anything better.
If you want to get over things, you need to live in the present moment and take action on things that are bothering you.
So, affirm to yourself that you live in the present moment, not the past, and you are willing to let go of those things that happened that you can’t change by moving forward with better decisions and better communication.
3. I Accept What Has Happened With All My Being
How can you really live in the present? Accept what has happened in the past.
It’s when we struggle with the past that we get stuck there. When we want to change it in some way, we can’t let it go.
When you accept what has happened as is, then you can bring your attention to the present moment and to the future.
For instance, if you got into a fight with your neighbor, and you can’t let it go, use the affirmation, ‘I accept what has happened with all my being.’ Allow yourself to be OK with what has happened in your mind and heart. Acknowledge that the fight happened and you accept it for what it was, not what you wish it would have been.
Accepting it will allow you to move forward without having to let it go. You will just let it be and start making decisions that ensure it doesn’t happen again or things get resolved.
4. I Am Grateful That The Argument Happened
When you can express gratitude around an argument you had, you have it made. You can easily let it go and see it for something more than just a painful experience that you relive over and over again.
For instance, I tried to help a co-worker with their job and it ended in an argument that got pretty intense. Every time I saw that co-worker my blood boiled until I was able to be grateful for the argument.
Why was I grateful?
- The argument helped me see that person for who they really were.
- I learned that not everyone is going to appreciate you for what you do, and that helped me deal with negative reactions better.
- My boss ended up moving me to a different shift that I enjoyed more.
- I gained the respect of some of my other co-workers who were more like-minded.
If you look, you can always find something to be grateful for in an argument. You may learn something, change something, become better, become more confident, or if you are willing and able to keep communicating with that person and work through it, create a stronger relationship.
5. I Don’t Need To Be Right
If you want to go back and tell that person why YOU were right, then this is the affirmation for you.
When you don’t need to be right, then you don’t need to go back and keep pushing the issue. You can let them think that they are right and move on knowing whatever truth is inside of you.
The interesting thing is this: When you stop needing to be right, you can see things from their point of view. When that happens, you will have an easier time letting go of the argument.
For instance, with my co-worker, I can see that they wanted to get all the credit for the work they did. They also believed that they knew everything there was to know about what they were doing and did not need anyone indicating that they might need to improve.
When you understand how they felt and where they were coming from, you can sympathize with them.
It doesn’t make them right. It just means that they reacted with the information they had, belief system they were guided by, and possibly ignorance that was holding them back from seeing things differently.
They did the best they could with what they had, and you will probably never be able to prove your point to them anyway. So, let go of the need to be right and let them know that you are right.
6. My Relationship Is More Important Than Holding Onto One Argument
Sometimes you just have to decide that your relationships are more important than changing or winning a past argument.
I think many of us have had to do this with our parents. They got mad and argued with us over something that they couldn’t understand. We felt bad. It didn’t get resolved. It couldn’t get resolved. And then we held onto that anger for years and years to come.
There comes a time when you just have to affirm to yourself that your relationship with that person is more important than one argument you had in the past.
Then you can focus more on the good things about your relationship and let go of that one bad thing that hasn’t been able to work itself out.
The 6 Affirmations Again:
- I’m not scared of confrontation.
- I live in the present moment.
- I accept what has happened with all my being.
- I am grateful that the argument happened.
- I don’t need to be right.
- My relationship is more important than holding onto an argument.