12 Dating Tips for Shy Guys

dating tips for shy guys
Photo by Peter Heeling

Finding that special someone is a challenge for everyone. This is true especially for shy guys who don’t know how to overcome the anxiety of going on a date with someone special.

In contrary to the usually confident image of most guys, there are some who feel the opposite about themselves, and that’s why it’s difficult for them to communicate with other people, and it gets even worse if it’s about starting a relationship.

If you are one of those guys or if you know someone who just couldn’t take that first step into dating, here are some tips that might help:

1. Know yourself.
One of the things that you have to do is to know yourself before you start building relationships. Start by asking these questions: What are the things you like and the aspects of yourself that you don’t like? What are the things that you’re comfortable with? What are your limits?

You have to know these things so that you’re ready and you know what to say when someone asks you about them. Just the feeling of being ready can be one of the ways to overcome nervousness and shyness.

2. Be confident.
This might not be easy but you have to try your best to be confident in your own skin. Confidence is not being arrogant and too proud. You don’t have to boast about your accomplishments or characteristics to show that you’re confident.

True confidence is more like trusting yourself – that you are capable of doing certain things and that you believe in yourself.

3. Stop comparing yourself to others.
You become scared and discouraged when you start comparing yourself to others. So what if the other guy is more popular than you are? You don’t have to look at other people and be sad because you’re not like them. Appreciate what you have and others will appreciate it too.

4. Take the first step.
If you’ve been waiting for love for the longest time, it’s now time for you to take action. Whenever you meet someone that you’re interested in, don’t wait for them to go to you and take the first step. If you can’t gather your courage to talk to them, a simple smile will do. Start with a wave, a smile, or a simple gesture as a practice. Maybe next time you’ll have the courage to talk to them or even ask them out.

5. Dress to represent, and dress comfortably, too.
To attract someone’s attention and for people to like you, you also have to consider the way you present yourself. When you’re in a party or a gathering, wear something that represents your personality.

You don’t have to go overboard by buying expensive clothes. Just wear something that’s comfortable and stylish enough. If you don’t know what to wear, ask someone for advice or read magazines and online articles on what kind of clothes are appropriate and suitable for you.

6. Take care of yourself.
A lot of guys often neglect body care. Don’t forget that whenever you present yourself to other people, they will not only notice your face but your whole body. Who would want to eat with someone who has dirty and long fingernails? Do you think someone will enjoy talking to you if you smell like you haven’t bathed in ten days? Proper hygiene is a must.

7. Improve your body language.
Look at yourself in the mirror and examine yourself. Do you look approachable or not? Practice smiling in front of a mirror so that you won’t feel awkward when doing so in public. How is your posture? Do you slouch when you stand? Stand straight and don’t keep your eyes on the ground. Proper posture is also a part of being confident. Also, when you’re talking to someone, make sure to make eye contact. Other people will know if you’re confident or not by looking at your body and your facial expressions.

8. Go out more often.
Some people believe that they don’t have to find their true love because love will find its way. But if you don’t go out, meet people, and just stay inside your house all the time, how can they find you? That’s why you have to connect with people by going out more often. Attend parties and gatherings so that you can make new friends. Don’t be afraid to try new things.

9. Find hobbies and do what makes you happy.
You don’t have to focus on just finding that special someone. Don’t forget to have fun and enjoy doing the things you love and also find new things that you can do. Maybe you wanted to try wall climbing or trekking but you were just hesitant? Start today because you’ll never know what you’ll discover or whom you’ll meet unless you do it.

10. Find people who share your interests.
You’ll be more relaxed and confident around people who have the same interests as you. Go out with them more often and learn from them. Teach yourself to be more courageous and communicate as much as you can.

11. Make friends with people who are more outgoing than you are.
Having friends who are outgoing can be very helpful for you. Sometimes you are forced to come out of your shell in certain situations. It’s also more likely that you’ll have more chances of meeting people when you’re with them compared to making friends who are equally shy. Go out with them more often so that you’ll learn how to be confident and outgoing like them.

12. Be patient.
If you think that it’s difficult for you to find your special someone, here’s some news for you – it’s not just you. A lot of people are still trying to find – or wait – for their perfect match. So don’t be sad, disappointed and lose hope. Never give up just because someone rejected you or did not return your smile. Try again next time because that someone you’re looking for is also trying. You just have to try and try until your paths finally meet.

Before you present yourself to others, you have to make sure that you are ready. Not just physically but also mentally and emotionally. Finding someone and building a relationship is not easy so you don’t have to rush yourself into it. First, you have to be sure of yourself. Be confident that you’re ready for it and that you will not back out. Be brave and have faith in yourself because if you don’t, other people won’t.

ALSO READ: 14 Tips to Make a Girl Fall in Love with You

Charm Villalon
Charm is a writer and a student. She is currently completing her Graduate Degree in Language Studies while refining her creativity and related skills through the visual arts: drawing and painting.

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