10 Things to Know When Dating an Independent Woman

Dating an independent woman
Photo by Tristan Colangelo

What kind of woman do you want to date? Most likely, the dating game centers on who you want to be in a relationship with. Most often than not, people forget to assess themselves to see if they fit the woman they are eyeing. No matter how many dates you seal, if you’re a mismatch to the ideal person you have in mind, things just won’t work out.

So you want to date an independent woman? Here are 10 things you should know before dating her:

1. She will not make you her world.
An independent woman is someone who will not make you their world. You might have a hard time setting a date with them because their schedules are full. They work, they see their friends after work, and they give time for their hobbies. Also, you can’t expect them to put you first. They are living their lives in a full circle, and you are just an addition. If you’re okay with that, go ahead with that date!

2. She’s a busy and productive woman.
Since they are busy living their lives, you also cannot expect them to reply to you in a matter of seconds. Since their lives are full, they don’t have much time to reply to you as fast as you want them to. Given that time constraint, it’ll be a little tricky to know if they are not replying because they are busy or they just don’t like you. It is best to know their pace for you not to arrive at misinterpretations.

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3. She has her own standards.
Aside from competing for their time, another thing you need to be prepared for when you are dating an independent woman is their standards. They have complete lives, so they are expecting yours is complete, too. The “you complete my world cliché” just won’t do the magic. They believe that a relationship is composed of two complete individuals who are ready to share their lives with others. They’re more likely to turn down people who need them to be complete. So, as sweet as that line may seem, it is best if you just complete your life first.

4. She can take care of herself.
Fixing your life should go hand in hand with fixing your idea of a woman. Why date an independent woman if she is not what you are looking for? If the kind of woman that you like is someone who’s clingy and who will make you her world, the independent kind might not be the one for you. If you want to play the role of a knight in shining armor, too late, an independent woman has already saved herself. If you want to be the sole provider, that’ll be insulting as an independent woman can pay for her own bills. So, before dating an independent woman, make sure she is really the one you are looking for.

5. She is financially independent.
Speaking of bills, when you date an independent woman, prepare to split the bill. Most likely, they’ll offer to pay for the meal they ordered and they really will. You can offer to shoulder all the expenses if you find it chivalric, but don’t impose your idea. She might get the wrong message that you’re telling her that she cannot pay for what she ordered.

6. She expects you to be a decision-maker.
Another thing that you need to prepare for is your itinerary. Leaving the decision making up to her can send her the wrong impression of you that you are someone who is incapable of making life-changing decisions. If you can’t decide on simple matters like what to eat or where to go after a cup of coffee, how can you decide for more serious things? So, when asked, “Where do you want to go next after having a coffee?”, instead of saying “your call”, why not say something like “I heard there’s a photo exhibit in the activity center. Why don’t we drop by?” By being suggestive, you can avoid sounding demanding. Just remember not to leave everything up to her. She makes decisions, so she won’t be interested in someone who can’t.

ALSO READ: 14 Things Men Should Do to Earn a Woman’s Trust

7. She has a sense of conviction.
As for conversations, be prepared to agree to disagree. An independent woman has her own stand regarding issues, so when you share your ideas and find out that they oppose hers, don’t spend your whole date convincing her to change her mind. Go ahead and share your ideas. Just don’t do that to prove her wrong.

8. She likes a smart guy.
Yes, she is more interested in people with ideas, so your looks might not be that much of a factor when she’s deciding if you have a chance of being in a relationship with her or you don’t. She’ll scrutinize what’s in your brain, and she’ll browse your life like it’s a library. She’ll search for what you can offer. She wants someone who’ll inspire her and who she can have deep conversations with. You have to be someone whos more than just a pretty face.

9. She likes to enjoy her own space.
An independent woman also likes spaces, and she’ll give you yours, too. You can’t expect her to update you if she’s already in a cab or if when she’s gonna prepare to sleep. The “after date” is her time for herself. She’s back to her personal space, and she’ll appreciate it if you’ll respect that. Don’t take this point as a sign that she does not like you or that your date is a failure. She’s just a fan of spaces. Don’t overthink.

10. She doesn’t need someone who will try to change her the way she is
You don’t like her concept of space? Sorry, it’s highly unlikely that she’ll change for you. Do you find her personality intimidating? Do you find her brutally honest? She won’t change for you. It’s like a take it or leave it kind of situation, unless of course, if they realize that their actions make them toxic.

A success factor that can make a date lead to a relationship is knowing who you are looking for, and assessing yourself if you are indeed a match with who you are eyeing. So, are you sure you want to date an independent woman? If so, go ahead and seal that date.

ALSO READ: 7 Things to Know Before Going Out on a Date

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Marielle Sunico
Wherever there is art, there is her heart. Marielle loves anything related to arts and literature. She’s into calligraphy, photography, writing and everything in between.

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