A relationship must indeed be between you and your partner alone. You should not let others dictate who to love or how you should run your relationship. However, whether we like it or not, how others see our relationship, especially those who care about us, can give us a clue if our relationship is healthy or unhealthy for us.
It feels good to have a relationship that your family and friends approve of. But how much more if it is God who is in favor of your love story?
Suppose you are a Christian committed to living your life for God; surely how the Lord sees your relationship matters deeply to you. Therefore, if you want to know if God approves your relationship, you can look for these signs:
1. It is biblical.
If you want a relationship that pleases God, you should have one that is biblical. Meaning, it must be in line with what the Bible says about a godly relationship. If yours fits God’s biblical standards, then God is undoubtedly approved of your relationship.
What are those biblical standards? One is you must share the same faith—believing the same God (2 Corinthians 6:14). It must also keep you from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:18). Another is it should be founded on true love according to God’s Word (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).
Let us discuss each of these more in the following numbers.
2. It leads you closer to God.
What is the reason why the Bible says that Christians must not commit to an unbeliever? Well, it is not a discrimination issue. It is simply an issue of loyalty. God wants His people to worship no other gods but Him. Based on biblical history, believers who engaged in relationships or marriages with people who have a different religious belief often ended up falling away from their own faith.
On the other hand, a relationship that God approves of will lead you even closer to Him. If your partner shares your faith, both of you can encourage each other to grow in your faith and knowledge of God’s will.
3. It preserves your purity.
One of the biblical standards for romantic relationships is that it must keep you from committing sexual immorality. Hebrews 13:4 says, “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”
Contrary to what modern society promotes, which normalizes physical intimacy between two unmarried people, the Bible discourages us from committing sexual intimacy outside marriage. Therefore, if you and your partner are doing your best to stay sexually pure until marriage, then your relationship pleases God.
4. It teaches you to love the person truly.
Moreover, God is undoubtedly within your relationship if it is founded on the love described in the Bible. In 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8, it says, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.”
If your relationship teaches you to more patient, kind, humble, and the other characteristics mentioned in this passage, you are on the right track. God indeed approves of it.
5. It motivates you to serve God and others.
In connection to no. 2, a relationship is right before God if it encourages you to serve Him and others more. Having a partner who shares your faith and purpose will lead to an agreement on how you should live your life.
Since the Christian faith encourages people to love God and people as the two greatest commandments (Matthew 22:36-40), a devoted Christian couple is likely to commit themselves to a ministry that allows them to serve God and others.
6. Your parents are in favor of the relationship.
Another sign that God approves of your relationship is when it has the approval of your parents. God has set your parents as your ‘managers’ on earth while you are not ready to be on your own yet. He had given them wisdom on taking care, training and guiding you as you grow up.
Therefore, if your parents are at peace with your relationship, it means that they see that you are in good hands. Instinctively, parents want only the best for their children, supporting your love life if they see that it is the best for you.
7. Your spiritual family also approves it.
Of course, your church or spiritual family can also be used by God to guide you in your relationship. If your spiritual leader and brothers and sisters in Christ favor your relationship, it means that they see that it follows the biblical standards.
Therefore, it is advisable to open up about your relationship with your leader or spiritually mature friends. They can be your accountability partners in making sure that your relationship does not make a wrong turn.
8. It helps you fulfill your calling.
Aside from the greatest commandments, the Bible encourages us to follow our specific callings from God. Usually, you would know your calling based on the spiritual gifts God has given you (Romans 12:6-8).
If you have a partner who is supportive of your ministry or encourages you to use your spiritual gifts to serve God and others, you are blessed. Best if your boyfriend or girlfriend has the same calling or at least complements yours.
9. It does not corrupt your character.
A relationship that pleases God will not influence you negatively. 1 Corinthians 15:33 says, “Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”
On the contrary, the right relationship will help you change your negative traits to be a better person. It encourages you to apply God’s Word in your life and be more Christlike in your character.
10. You have peace about the relationship.
Another sign that God approves of your relationship is the peace you feel whenever you are with your partner. There is joy, contentment, and purity in what you feel towards the person and your relationship. It is also possible that you can see yourself marrying your boyfriend or girlfriend.
The Holy Spirit often convicts or warns believers whenever they are misled to an ungodly relationship through promptings. So, if God disapproves of your relationship, expect that you will have no peace, and there will be urges to leave.
It helps you become a better version of yourself
Overall, a relationship that pleases God helps you to change for the better. In addition, it will lead you to holistic growth, making you more mature in the process.
To make sure that you will be in a godly relationship, make it a habit to ask God for guidance in all areas, including your love life. Of course, it also helps if you study the Bible religiously to gain wisdom in how to make the right decisions, especially in choosing the person to marry.
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