There are moments in our day when we look at a happy couple strolling at the park or an old married couple sharing a milkshake, and ask the question: how did they manage to come that far? What is the secret to a long and lasting relationship? Is there a secret formula to a happy and everlasting companionship?
The funny thing is when you do approach these couples, they won’t tell you that they had it easy because they didn’t! Relationships take a lot of hard work and many people fail to realize this so they are unable to put in the work that is actually required to make the relationship grow. But if you are willing to learn, then here are seven effective ways to make your relationship work:
1. Talk about the relationship.
We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: communication is the key to a successful relationship. No matter how cliche this may sound, it’s a cliche for a reason, and that’s because it’s true! One can’t express how important it is for two people to talk and communicate in a relationship.
Although the saying goes that there are things better left unsaid, this doesn’t mean the same way for people in relationships. It’s significant for growth for you and your partner to talk about your relationship, address the elephant in the room, and bring the problem forth. If you don’t acknowledge the problems in your relationship, you will never be able to move forward and instead continue to dwell in the same toxic spot.
2. Be honest with yourself and your partner.
What’s the point of being in a relationship when you’re just going to lie, right? It goes without saying that honesty is the best policy when it comes to making the relationship work. If you want everything to work out between the two of you, then you have to start telling the truth now, if you haven’t been doing this already.
Another important thing to always remember is, to be honest with yourself. Once you start thinking about the truth, building the transparency between you and your partner will come easily. Express your thoughts towards subject matters and do your best to embed honesty within every word.
3. Share with them the little things.
Making a relationship work is like making the machine work, all parts, whether small or big, are important and play a role. It isn’t enough that you share with them the big news, you also have to tell them the little and even most mundane stuff about your day. This is to make them feel that you really do care about them enough to share this with them.
This also applies in the opposite way. Even if you tell them the little details but you don’t share with them the most important and biggest news of the day, you might make your partner feel a bit left out. Remember that he or she is your loved one and they should always be the first one to know before anyone else.
4. Make reasonable compromises.
Another key to a successful relationship is to make reasonable compromises. There will be many times throughout the years when you and your partner will not always see eye to eye. This usually leads to arguments where most couples would refuse to give in and lower their pride which results in them eventually breaking up.
Keep in mind that this is the two of you against the problem and not the other way around. Don’t let conflict get in between your relationship and instead direct your energy into fixing it. Make sure to come up with an equal and reasonable compromise so that both of you will end up happy.
ALSO READ: What Makes a Relationship Successful?
5. Let them be their own person.
You should give everything you’ve got for your relationship, but if there’s one thing you shouldn’t lose, it’s yourself. Don’t let the relationship take away pieces of who you really are. It’s easy to get carried away by everything especially when you’re in love because you’re very willing to do all the sacrifices to make it work.
At the same time, allow your partner to be their own person. Just because you two are together, it doesn’t mean he or she has to change in order to fit your preferences. Aside from the fact that this can be controlling and suffocating, having this kind of trait will never make both of you grow in your relationship.
6. Place your partner above anyone else.
If you want your dynamics to work out, you have to place your partner above everything else. Make him or her feel like the top priority in your life and that you are willing to do the hard work so that everything will be better. Never make your loved one feel left out or uncared for, whether by intention or not, because neglect is one of the easiest ways for a relationship to rot.
Instead, give attention to your partner, let him or her know that you will always be there for them. It doesn’t matter what you have on your plate right now, the important thing is that you put them first. Always.
7. Trust the process and see where it goes.
The last tip on this list is to just the process and see where it goes. In other words, go with the flow of the relationship. After you have tried and done everything on this list, it’s best to sit back and wait for what will happen next.
You should never rush these things because relationships take time to grow. You need to give it space in order for it to breathe. The last thing you’d want to do is to snuff it out before it even becomes something else.
Relationships are no easy work that’s for sure. It’s not all fun and exciting moments all the time, in fact, there are times when it looks like the problems and rains are never going to end. You just have to place trust in your partner that you’re going to get through this no matter what.
It takes two to tango and it also takes two for a relationship to work. If you’re the only one willing to move forward then it’s a no-go. Both sides should agree to put in the effort to achieve your happily ever after!
Online courses recommended for you:
- Relationship Coaching: Transform Problems into Growth & Love:
Develop true love & greater intimacy & a relationship growth mindset, stop destructive conflicts, find meaning & purpose.
- Love & Connection: The Science of Successful Relationships:
This course will show you how to examine the unknown path that you’ll travel with your spouse, and carefully evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship.