Newlywed and still groping in the dark of how it is to be a good wife? Or you have probably been married for many years but it seems like you still have to learn a lot about being a real partner to your husband. Either way, I hope this list can help you be the best version in this special role of being ‘wifey’.
So, what are the qualities that make a good wife material?
1. Understands she is not single anymore
Well, this is the first and foremost reminder that any wife should absorb into her system. Once you are married, especially if you have kids already, then you cannot live the same lifestyle you had enjoyed when you were single. This means less “me-time” because you have to put the needs of your family first before your need for parties, shopping, and hanging out with girlfriends.
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2. Respects hubby
No matter how much your personalities, views, and principles differ from each other, you have to respect your husband—like how you would want him to respect you. Yes, you can point out your ideas, but never ever insist that you are right and he is wrong, or call him stupid. Also, never embarrass him in public, particularly in front of your family or his, his friends or yours, and especially in front of your children.
3. Treats him like a king
You want your husband to treat you like his queen, right? Therefore, you also need to treat him like a king—and that is by serving him wholeheartedly. This does not mean lowering yourself to the level of a martyred slave, but it means initiating a selfless kind of relationship between you. It would not hurt cooking him his favorite dish, giving him a massage, preparing his attire for work the next day, and simply making him a cup of coffee every morning.
4. Does not nag
Have you ever been nagged by your mom when you were a kid? It was annoying, right? Your husband feels the same every time you nag him about every little thing he does—him leaving his dirty socks lying around, forgetting about picking up deliveries, and so on. Instead of pestering him with sermons, why not talk to him sensibly about your concerns to avoid fights and high blood pressures?
5. Makes time for her partner
Whether you are a housewife or a working one, you must not make busyness an excuse not to spend time with your husband anymore. To keep the love alive even after long years of marriage, couples should not stop dating each other. Both of you should decide to go out together or simply have a hearty talk over cups of coffee at least once a week.
6. Accepts that he is imperfect
Marriage makes you discover more of your partner’s flaws—usually pricking the bubble of your happy married life dream. However, instead of wishing you could marry someone else, you must understand that both of you are not perfect so the best thing to do is help each other become better. Instead of constantly pointing out his flaws, assure him that you still love him despite his shortcomings.
7. Is financially wise
The responsibility of proper budgeting and money management must be shared by both husband and wife. For this reason, if you are poor at this, then you have to start learning how to be a better financial manager—this advice goes for your husband as well. This way, you can help save your marriage from a possible breakup due to money problems.
8. Forgives and forgets
Since both of you are imperfect, your marriage should have an allowance for mistakes—there should be grace. If you want to keep your husband, then it means you should be willing to forgive whenever he commits mistakes and give him a second chance. In addition, the next time you fight, stop bringing back past issues since you have already forgiven him for them.
9. Trusts him completely
Having committed to trust your husband fully means not being suspicious towards him all the time. Until proven that he is doing or has done something wrong, then avoid acting like a detective or getting jealous easily. This will only lead you to paranoia.
10. Supports his passion and dreams
As a wife, you should be the number one cheerleader of your husband. No matter how difficult the journey into it is, do not discourage your partner from pursuing his dream. You should believe in him—assure him that—and help him in any way you can.
11. Does not tolerate what is wrong
Being supportive of your husband does not include tolerating his mistakes. As his wife, it is part of your role to make sure he stays being a good person and citizen, not just for your family and the community, but for himself as well. Rebuke him by talking to him gently about the matter, and help him change or do what is right.
12. Keeps a harmonious relationship with husbands’ loved ones
Loving your husband and accepting who he is involve loving the people he values as well—his family and friends. Therefore, respect his immediate family, especially his parents; show kindness to them; and visit them from time to time. You should also make an effort to get to know his friends better and treat them as your own friends too.
13. Takes care of herself
Being a good wife is not limited to putting the needs of your husband first. You know your hubby loves you, so if you would get sick or something bad happens to you, then it would affect him much. For this reason, keep yourself healthy and fit—and this could also help keep your husband in love with you.
14. Prays for him regularly
As a wife, you know you have no super powers so you cannot help or protect your husband at all times. For this reason, you need to acknowledge the one who can do these best—and that is God. Praying for your husband daily is actually the best thing you can do for him.
Go for it, wifey!
More than anything else, the best advice I could give you is to simply love unconditionally. Give without expecting anything in return. You can only do this without draining your self-esteem by loving yourself first. Learn to value yourself, and do not base your self-worth on anybody’s affection. You may be a wife—the other half in a sacred union—but you are an individual as well.
ALSO READ: 32 Qualities of a Good Husband