Relationships have plenty of types and complicated situations. But no matter what kind it is, it all takes patience, effective communication, endurance, commitment, and above all, trust. Long distance relationship is one of the hardest situations you can get in to, that even accepting the fact that you can’t be with your partner is already hard enough to handle. It takes more and a lot of effort to keep everything working between the both of you because expressing what you feel would be harder to do unlike normal relationships.
LDR is really not easy and not everyone can keep up with it so you have to be mature and tough enough to face all the difficulties.
Here are some tips to help you on building trust in a long distance relationship:
1. Get to know each other well.
Ask about what he/she likes, their favorite food, where they want to travel, what they hate, or anything you want to know about them. Try to listen attentively if he/she tells you something, it will make them interested to tell you more about themselves so pay attention.
Don’t just let your partner do all the talking, you should also tell him/her things about you to keep your conversation going because telling each other personal stuff will bring more excitement to your relationship. And you have to take note of every detail he/she tells you so you would know how to tell if somethings bothering them, or how you would make them feel better.
2. Communicate every day.
It might be hard to communicate with your boyfriend or girlfriend because of the different time zones, or both of you being too busy and all but you have to at least find time to talk with each other. Regular communication is the key to sustain your relationship. It connects the both of you and keeps the relationship going so if there’s no communication, then there’s no relationship.
Giving updates like going out with your friends or arriving from work would be fine as long as they know what’s going on in your life. But you still have to make up for the days you haven’t chatted. Agree on a day for you guys to talk for and catch up on everything you want to tell each other.
3. Be open with your partner.
An open and honest relationship is a healthy one. Don’t be scared to open up about what worries you, or about problems you can’t handle. The same thing goes for him/her. If they feel bad or frustrated about something, they should be comfortable opening up to you. Your partner is not only your lover, they can also be your best friend if both of you would just talk openly about what you feel. Be completely honest with your partner and trust that he/she will be with you.
4. Give them time for themselves.
Though you are miles apart and may want to spend every minute talking with each other, you also have to give him/her space and time for their own life. Don’t demand for their time and don’t be over-possessive towards your partner for they might feel you’re already too controlling. They also have other important things to do and you can’t expect them to spend all their time on you.
5. Have faith in you partner.
Having faith in your partner is also having faith in your relationship. If you believe in him/her and what they do, then you trust them enough to commit yourself, your feelings, and the relationship to them. Being faithful will make you feel positive and secure on most of the things within your relationship.
6. Don’t assume negative things to what he/she does.
There might come an instance where you are going to be confused or alarmed about what he/she did. They might not call or tell you hurtful things unintentionally, but don’t jump into conclusions. Instead, assume that there’s a reasonable explanation about whatever he/she did. Maybe they were just having a rough time or were just too busy. Ask them about it the next time you talk, it will help you be a little less worried.
7. Have compassion and think of your partner’s situation.
Considering your partner’s situation also means you have to take control of your feelings. Make them feel a bit lighter especially when you know that life’s being a little too hard on them. Let him/her rest if you know they’re too tired to talk. You can save your story and tell it to them next time, or let your tantrums slide because he/she has to get ready for a test or has bigger problems and you don’t want to make it harder for them. This will also help you to be more understanding and save you from arguments.
8. Talk about your misunderstandings calmly.
In every relationship, there will always be arguments and misunderstandings. When this happens, take a deep breath, stay calm and talk about it rationally to avoid making the situation worse. Make an effort to understand his/her side, and explain to them what you feel.
You guys should work together to come up with a solution that will make the both of you happy. Don’t let arguments tear you apart, instead let it be an opportunity to help you and your partner be mature in facing any difficulties and build a stronger foundation on your relationship.
9. Always tell the truth no matter how painful it is.
Lies are one of the main reasons why long distance relationships fail and come to an end. Telling the truth may not be easy to do but it is the safest option. Your boyfriend or girlfriend may get hurt hearing the truth from you but that’s better than hearing lies that would hurt them even more knowing that the one they love and trust lied to them.
Don’t make them doubt on you because doubting is next to breaking trust. Be honest to your lover, it will make them appreciate you more for making a better decision for your relationship.
10. Plan on your next visit.
After days, months, or years of being apart, you must also plan on the day you’ll be seeing each other again. It could be you who’s going to visit or your significant other, or maybe plan on a vacation somewhere. Either way, both of you would be glad about it. Who wouldn’t be right? This will give you and you partner something to look forward to. And if that day comes (which is the most exciting part of being in a long distance relationship), make the most out of it, treasure every moment and always be thinking about the next one.
It may be hard for some to build trust especially when you are miles away from each other, but it will all be worth it once you beat the challenges that try to tear you and your partner apart. Trust in your love and the strength of your relationship and the both of you will be happy and contented with all the achievements you have as a couple.