There’s no such thing as a perfect relationship. Every pair, no matter how good they look from the outset, or no matter how strong they seem in terms of exploring life together, have their own set of ups and downs. They fight and sometimes bicker, they get frustrated with each other and cry at the end of the day. But these scenes are normal. It happens even to the best of couples we know.
Guess what: it all boils down to how you handle the relationship.
Of course, every couple aims to achieve an ideal relationship, but there’s no such thing as that. You’d rather aim for a healthy relationship instead, as this is the kind that’s more attainable. But how exactly can you and your partner do that? Below are 10 tips to start with:
The core of any relationship is respect, and this is something most couples forget once they are overshadowed by the romance they feel for each other. However, always remember that love isn’t always about the giddy feeling, but more about making life more meaningful with your partner. Hence, it is essential that you respect each other, from your qualities to your flaws, and most importantly, your individualities. With respect as a solid foundation, it would be less difficult for you two to face the challenges that may come your way.
ALSO READ: How to Treat Your Girlfriend with Respect
2. Learn to listen.
Did you know that one of the hardest things to do when in a relationship is to listen? Most of the time you just hear what your partner says and vice versa, and only take into account the things that matter to you, but not necessarily including those that matter to them. And yes, this can to turn into a disaster in the long run, just because you didn’t listen to what your other half was saying.
So take the time to listen. Pay attention to what your partner says, from their ideas and aspirations, even to their qualms and pet peeves. You not only get to know him or her deeper, but also learn to value them as a person too.
3. Be consistent.
Another way to work towards a healthy relationship is by being consistent. We’re not saying that you adopt a routine, but just maintain the way you treat each other like when you were first starting out. Sure, you two may change over the course of time, but the consistency of your actions towards each other is one of the most powerful ways that keep your relationship intact. It’s because no matter how you two transition, the consistency prevents you from being strangers with each other.
4. Have a support group.
There are always instances when you and your partner are having trouble resolving a problem together, and during these times you can’t avoid but seek the advice from family and friends. It is thus best to have a support group, i.e. people close to the both of you whom you can seek sound advice from. You may not necessarily heed their advice, but it’s good to have another perspective to see how you can solve your issues in the best way possible.
5. Trust your partner’s decisions.
Some relationships fail because both parties have no confidence in each other. It’s understandable that you only want the best for your partner, but as an individual, he or she has a life to live too. It would then be better if you two would learn how to trust each other’s decisions, may it be where to eat or choosing to do a big career move. After all, healthy relationship is the kind where both partners have the freedom to explore the world not necessarily always together, but on each his or her own too.
6. Learn to say “No.”
Saying “no” is one of the hardest things to do when in a relationship, especially when it involves your partner. But like any other setup, a relationship has its limitations. You and your partner have to be realistic about your situation and learn to decline certain opportunities and instances which you know may tear your relationship apart.
These include hanging out too much with friends (that puts either of you at risk to fits of jealousy), overspending on unnecessary things, and sometimes even dedicating more time on work (making you miss out on quality time).
7. Explore new things together.
A healthy relationship is the one where you two are not afraid to try out new things. You get to see each other’s flaws and bloopers, as well as newfound strengths and abilities. It would best to get out of your comfort zone every once in a while-eat in a new restaurant, go out of town, or learn a new skill together.
8. Don’t bicker on social media.
When in an argument, it is highly recommended that you maintain the discussion within the confines of personal interaction. Do not ever take it to platforms such as Facebook or Twitter, because this only aggravates the problem that you already have. If you want to say something, say it in front of your partner’s face, not to your wall for the public to see. Their comments and reactions will only ensue more argument and may hurt your partner’s feelings as well.
9. Have realistic goals.
Healthy relationships are those that move forward, not stagnate. But how do you move forward when you don’t have goals?
If you and your partner are becoming more serious into the relationship, then it’s recommended that you start setting goals which you two can work and achieve together. By having goals, you get to exercise joint dedication, determination, and fulfillment. If your goals pan out despite both your efforts, then you get to share each other’s despair and rise from that as well.
10. Be each other’s best friend.
Couples who are in a romantic relationship often forget that they are also friends. Hence, when they break up, everything that they shared is put to waste. And that’s not healthy. You may want to go the other route by being not only another couple, but by being each other’s best friend.
By nurturing a solid friendship on top of your relationship, the more capable you and your partner become in growing and maturing together.
Romance comes and goes, but that’s not the essence of a healthy relationship. If you are able to nurture love, respect, trust, and friendship with your partner, then rest assured that your relationship is strong enough to stand against the test of time.