Have you experienced so many failures in life, such as failing the board exam twice, inability to get through job interviews, or being defeated in singing contests? Are you discouraged from trying again? Or do you consider yourself a complete loser because of those downfalls?
It is normal to fail because humans are not perfect. The best thing you can do to conquer your fear of failure is to set your mind on the truth that you can do better next time. If those experiences left you traumatized and now you are afraid to try again, then here are 12 tips to help you overcome self-doubt.
1. Read the stories of successful people who failed a lot of times before their breakthroughs.
One of the best ways to unfear failure is by understanding that all successful people have gone through discouraging failures first before they have achieved their rewards. Instead of being hopeless, most of them used their letdowns as a motivation to try harder in order to succeed. In the end, they have proven that failures can be your stepping stones to a new summit—it just depends on your perspective.
2. Know that failure is part of success.
You are not perfect, so you cannot expect yourself to achieve your target goals perfectly at the first try. Life is a series of trial and error, and it just depends on you when to stop trying. Just know that you can never win if you quit, and there will always be a chance to win as long as you do not quit.
3. Condition your mind to be a risk-taker so you will not regret anything afterward.
Life is a gamble—meaning there is no guarantee that you will always win. However, if you fear failures, then you will be afraid to take risks. This may save you from ‘embarrassments’—if you consider failures as such—but you will always be left with ‘what ifs’. Seeing others achieve what you have always wanted would make you regret the opportunities you ran away from.
4. Understand that failure is not something to be ashamed of.
The only things that one should be embarrassed about are criminal acts. Unless you have harmed other people, you do not have to be ashamed of committing errors. Just so you know, a failure does not define a person, but it is his/her character instead.
5. Stop thinking about what others will say about you.
One of the reasons why most people are afraid of failures is because of what others will say. It is normal for humans to desire approval and appreciation from others, but it is not healthy to base your worth on how others perceive you. Remember that no one has the right to judge you, and even those who do have their own shares of mistakes too.
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6. Take every failure as an opportunity to improve your craft.
Instead of being discouraged whenever you fail, use it as a challenge to try harder next time. Find out why you have failed, and figure out how you can avoid the same mistake in your next try. Learn from those mistakes and apply that learning to get a better result next time.
7. Think of failure as a test of your character.
What makes a failure worse is if you fail to respond the right way to it. Most of the time, failures happen in your life to test your character. There are some who resort to blaming others, criticizing those who have succeeded, and not being sport enough to accept defeat. On the other hand, the best way to respond to such a situation is by being humble, open to suggestions and criticisms, and persistent to do better.
8. Be encouraged by those who experienced many failures in the past.
Another way to encourage yourself to overcome this fear is by listening to the stories of people you personally know. Surely, there are many around you who had tasted defeats before they achieved sweet victories. Learn from how they got up from each fall, and persevere not to give up on your own fight as well.
9. Willingly accept mentoring and constructive criticisms.
Humility is one of the best traits of successful people. If you want to succeed in life, then you need to accept that you do not know everything yet and you need help. Asking help from those who know better than you is a wise step. Also, take criticisms constructively and use them to improve.
10. Be open to better strategies and ways.
Moreover, be open to changes. If your previous tactics in your craft have not brought you any success, then consider changing your strategies. Learn from the professionals in your field and try to mix their styles with yours. Openness to suggestions can help you to improve as well.
11. Give your best shot all the time.
You cannot be the winner always but what is important is that you give your 100% in what you do. If you have lost or failed in spite of doing your best, then you will have no regrets because you know that was your all. Whereas, if you have failed because of mediocracy, then you would have ‘what if’s. Therefore, instead of setting your eyes on the prize, focus on how you can deliver excellence first.
12. Do your best and leave the rest to God.
Having faith in God will also help you be more confident in pursuing your goals, especially if you sincerely ask help from Him. Believing that He is a rewarder to those who trust in Him and He is fair enough to help the hard-workers succeed, rest assured that you will get what is meant for you. Have faith that God is on your side.
Go and Try Again
Do not let your previous failures stop you from following your dreams. As long as you are alive, you still have a chance to succeed so why give up? As the saying goes, “try and try until you succeed”. Grab the next opportunity that comes your way.