Struggling with a temptation that could ruin your relationship now? Are you afraid that you might end up cheating on your partner/spouse?
Being in love with your partner or spouse is not a guarantee that you would be faithful to him/her. There are some people in-love who get caught in momentary lapses which could result in emotional damages and broken relationships.
If you want to find out how to resist the temptation that can threaten your relationship, here are 18 sensible ways to do it.
1. Be aware of your temptations.
The very first thing you need to do is acknowledge your vulnerability. Being aware of your temptations will help you to be more watchful of your behaviors, decisions, and thoughts.
2. Tell your partner about your weakness.
Surely, your spouse or partner understands that you are not perfect. S/he will appreciate your openness.
Giving him/her a head’s up of your weakness is a sign that you want to fight it off. Also, your partner can help you overcome temptations by checking on you.
3. Find an accountability partner.
It is also advisable that you find an accountability partner, aside from your beloved. It should be someone from the same sex who is mature and trustworthy. The role of your accountability partner is to check on you, rebuke you when needed, and pray for you.
4. Get counseling.
If you keep on failing in this area, then seeking professional help can also be a good idea. You can go to a spiritual mentor or find a psychologist.
5. Think about how it will affect your relationship.
What if you gave in? Have you ever thought about what could happen if your spouse or partner found out? Are you willing to risk your relationship for momentary pleasure?
Even if you get forgiven, it would be hard to restore your partner’s trust.
6. Ask yourself if your partner deserves it.
Yes, there is a chance that your partner might never discover your affair. However, do you really think s/he deserves to be cheated on?
Your partner or spouse may not be perfect, but s/he could be so devoted to you and is trying to be the best for you.
7. Avoid friends who encourage you to cheat.
If you have friends who think to be able to cheat is cool, then stay away from them. True friends will help you protect your relationship or marriage.
As the saying goes, “Bad company corrupts good character”. Therefore, choose your friends wisely.
8. Cut or limit ties with those you are attracted to.
You may think you are not doing anything bad yet but fantasizing of someone else is already cheating. Also, if you know you are attracted to someone and you intentionally find ways to keep in touch or be together, then you are in trouble.
To avoid this, flee from the temptation. Limit your communication or being around the person. Or, if there is no point in staying in contact with him/her, just cut off the connection.
9. Stay away from places where you should not be.
What are those places you should stay away from? They are the areas you do not want your partner to know about. For instance, avoid going to private places where you could be alone with someone else from the opposite sex.
10. Develop transparency in your relationship.
Another way to keep yourself from temptations is by keeping transparency in your relationship. Being transparent includes giving each other access to your accounts and gadgets.
Some people do not like this idea since this invades their privacy. Nevertheless, the temptation is lesser knowing your partner can find out.
11. Turn your thoughts to something else.
If your mind keeps being haunted by tempting thoughts, then distract yourself. Think about something positive or productive. Or think about how you love your spouse or partner.
You can also make yourself busy with work or a hobby.
12. Be honest with your partner.
If you are tempted to cheat right now, it is best if you open up with your partner. Admit it, the more you repress something, the more it presses on you. Once you open up, you would realize that it was only a passing urge because the thrill is gone.
Yes, s/he might become upset once you open up. However, it could be worse if you tell him/her after you fail. Besides, s/he deserves to know the truth.
ALSO READ: 4 Simple Ways to be Honest in a Relationship
13. Practice mind over matter.
No matter how much tempted you are, you need a strong will to have self-control. Do not follow your heart, which represents your fleeting emotions. Rather, heed your brain, which means your sound judgment and reasoning.
14. Fix the problem in your relationship.
Some people cheat because they have a problem with their relationship. If this is the case, please fix the problem, not add another. If you want to keep your relationship going, then do not do something that can completely end it.
Talk with your partner. Come up with possible solutions and cooperate with each other. Also, work together to reignite the passion in your relationship.
15. Confront the other person, if necessary.
If the other party is obviously hitting on you or has expressed a desire to flirt with you, then speak up. The ‘tempter’ would keep coming if you are passive about it. S/he probably thinks you want it to go on.
To keep the person from tempting you, then boldly tell him/her to stop. Decline indecent proposals and tell the person that you are committed.
16. Weigh between love and lust.
Please understand that being attracted to a person does not necessarily mean love. What you probably feel for the other person is only lust. It is possibly just a physical attraction that will soon go away.
If you are sure that you love your partner and you know you are only drawn to another person by lust, then be wise. Never risk true love for lust, which is temporary.
17. Humble yourself before God.
It is hard to overcome temptations because we are only humans. If you are desperate to resist them, then ask help from God. Acknowledge that you cannot do it by your own strength.
Make it part of your daily prayers to have the courage and strength to flee from temptations.
18. Get wisdom and reminders from the Bible.
Reading the Bible regularly can help you change your perspective about temptations too. There are a lot of reminders and nuggets of wisdom about resisting temptations that you can find in it.
For instance, 1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us that God will not allow us to be tempted beyond what we are able to bear. If you want testimonies that temptations can be overcome, read the success stories of Joseph (Genesis 39) and Jesus (Matthew 4:1-11).
Do not give in
No matter how strong the temptation is, rest assured that it is possible not to fail. All you need to do is actively resist it.
It is up to you if you want to give in or not. However, if you do, think about the possible consequences. Are you ready for them? If you know they will only destroy you, then why give in?
ALSO READ: 10 Ways to Overcome Lust in a Relationship