In my previous article, I discussed 12 signs from the Bible that may guide single ladies in choosing the right guy to marry. The article received positive feedback and became quite popular so I think it would be nice to also write something for single men this time – an article that will guide them in finding the right woman to be their wife.
You might be wondering why there are more guides (20 vs. 12) in finding the right wife than in finding the right husband. I believe it’s because a woman who’ll become both a wife and a mother will have greater physical, mental and emotional responsibilities than a husband and a father.
I think it’s not unfair since most women who are naturally born to be good wives and mothers will not find them difficult to follow and fulfill. In fact, the majority of my friends naturally became good wives and caring mothers when they entered married life.
But of course, just like men, there is still a percentage of women whom single guys should avoid if they don’t want to live a miserable life with the wrong wife.
A good wife is someone who doesn’t only take care of her husband, but also her children and household. She is the light that guides your home and the love that nurtures it. She also maintains peacefulness, gentleness, and happiness within it.
In Proverbs 31:10-31, the Bible has actually described “a wife of noble character” whom men should strive to find. Although the verses may not already entirely applicable in our modern times, single men can still get some good ideas that will help them find the right woman to marry.
Below are 20 signs extracted from Proverbs 31:10-31 and other passages in the Bible that may guide single guys in finding the right girl they should exchange wedding bows with at the altar and be their wife for the rest of their lives.
1. You find her extraordinary.
“A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.” – Proverbs 31:10 (NIV)
In other words, there is something in her that you treasure her more than anyone and anything in this world. It can be an extraordinary kindness, love, or great character. Remember that it should be something that lasts more than a precious gem – something from within, not without – something about her wholeness, not only a cover. Hence, it cannot only be physical beauty since it fades with the passage of time.
2. She is someone you can trust.
“Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.” – Proverbs 31:11 (NIV)
If you want to have peace of mind and prevent yourself from always being jealous, dubious and insecure, find someone who will give you security, honesty, and full confidence
3. She is harmless and she brings good things to your life.
“She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” – Proverbs 31:11-12 (NIV)
A good wife is someone who will make you a better man. She will inspire you to be happy and healthy, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
4. She takes care of your family and home.
“She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants.” – Proverbs 31:13-15 (NIV)
In other words, she is just like your loving and caring mother.
5. She is practical and knows how to manage things.
“She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings, she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. ” – Proverbs 31:16-19 (NIV)
We, the guys, will surrender our income to our wives. Hence, choose someone who will handle it properly, not squander it recklessly. It’s also good to have a practical wife who doesn’t only rely fully on your own money but also strives to provide something for her family out of her own efforts. You don’t like to marry someone who will make you a sugar daddy, do you?
6. She is kind and generous.
“She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.” – Proverbs 31:20 (NIV)
Marry a woman who is kind to the poor so that your family will be blessed. A wife who will look down on your poor relatives and friends will only create enemies and may not give your family peace, security, and true prosperity.
7. She is caring and protective.
“When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. – Proverbs 31:21-22 (NIV)
Your wife will be in charge of your home. That means she will have to protect you and your children from illness and other unhealthy situations. She also has to protect herself to continue her duties as a wife and as a mom. So do you like to have a wife who just doesn’t care?
8. She is a strong and honorable woman.
“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.” – Proverbs 31:25 (NIV)
A wife who has a strong conviction and maintains great principles in life will bring honor and glory to your home.
9. She is wise and reliable.
“She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.” – Proverbs 31:26 (NIV)
Your wife, the mother of your children will serve as the guiding light in your home. If you want to raise children with a brighter tomorrow, find a woman who has wisdom and insight into the future.
10. She is not lazy.
“She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” – Proverbs 31:27 (NIV)
Sloth means being lazy and not giving care. It’s one of the negative characteristics of a partner that can be destructive to your home and family. If you like your family to survive life’s unending challenges, have a wife who’s a woman of action, not a slothful one.
11. She is righteous and praiseworthy.
“Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:” – Proverbs 31:28 (NIV)
Do not just look for a girl who always posts “feeling blessed” on her Facebook status, but someone whose family and friends are feeling blessed to have her in their lives.
Take note that a blessing is not something you declare or announce. It is something that God gives you because of your righteousness. “The LORD’s curse is on the house of the wicked, but he blesses the home of the righteous.” – Proverbs 3:33 (NIV)
12. She always strives to be better.
“Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” – Proverbs 31:29 (NIV)
An ideal wife is someone who will do good things, not just because other men’s wives do them too, but because they are the right things to do. She surpasses other women, not because she competes with them, but because she competes with herself and tries to improve every day a little bit more.
13. She avoids things that are disgraceful.
“A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones. – Proverbs 12:4 (NIV)
Who likes a wicked and scandalous wife? Now, who likes a wife whose words and actions are those that we can be proud of? Of course, we like the latter.
14. She is not ill-tempered and quarrelsome.
“Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. – Proverbs 25:24 (NIV)
A bad-tempered and irritable wife will always make your house noisy, chaotic, and stressful, not only for you but also for your children, not to mention it’s also disgusting to your neighbors.
15. She cares for your future.
“Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.” – Proverbs 19:14 (NIV)
How do you know if your girlfriend is one sent by God? She acts with care for your future. If your girl doesn’t care what will happen to you in the future, if she doesn’t care if you lose your job or ruin your studies, or if she doesn’t care if you will lose your health or life, then you should do a lot of ponderings.
16. She respects you.
“However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” – Ephesians 5:33 (NIV)
Respect begets respect. There must be mutual respect between a husband and a wife. Thus, marry a girl whom you do not only respect but also respects you in return.
17. She fulfills her duties and responsibilities as a wife.
“The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.” – 1 Corinthians 7:3 (NIV)
A husband and wife have mutual duties and responsibilities to each other, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically. If one doesn’t fulfill his or her duties, the marriage becomes imbalanced and may come to an end.
18. She is loyal and faithful to you.
“The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.” – 1 Corinthians 7:4 (NIV)
One of the top reasons why couples fight is the disobedience of the verse above. Some women don’t like their partners to prevent them from wearing sexy dresses, which makes men angry and cause them to have a fight. Without surrendering each one’s authority over their own body, jealousy and insecurities will only arise.
Therefore, marry a woman who’s ready to grant you the right over her own body. If she truly loves you, then she is more willing to give you security and peace of mind. Of course, you should also give her the authority over your body to be fair.
19. She follows your righteous lead.
“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.” – Ephesians 5:22-23 (NIV)
One of the most difficult instructions from the Bible a woman could follow is to be submissive to her husband. Nowadays, some women don’t like to be led by men as they think that the modern way is to do the opposite. Somehow, we cannot blame them due to the history of men who have misled their wives rather than lead them the right way. But the Bible is clear that the wives should submit to their own husbands.
To have a peaceful and happy marriage life, you should first make yourself a man who’s worthy to lead a woman. After that, you can already find a wife who can submit herself to you as her husband. If despite your worthiness your girl doesn’t follow you but maintains her ego and pride, then that’s a sign that she’s not the one. Besides, love is not proud, isn’t it?
ALSO READ: 18 Signs He’s the One Sent by God for You
20. She is God-fearing.
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” – Proverbs 31:30 (NIV)
Finally, find a woman who’s God-fearing, simply because, if she has fear and respect in God, then she will humbly and faithfully follow all the guides above which are all beneficial to you, to her, to your future children, and future family.
I hope that this article will serve as a guide for single guys in finding the right woman to be their wife. And of course, I’m also hoping that single women or even married ones can also get some ideas from this article on how they can make themselves a better wife for their husband. Remember that the purpose of this article is not to judge or dump anyone, but to assess ourselves, find opportunities for personal development, influence our loved ones to improve, and ensure a better life for our future.
Your choice lies in your own hands.
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12 Signs He’s the Guy You Should Marry According to the Bible
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It is very impossible as it is for many of us single guys to meet the right woman, let alone getting married. Women today aren’t like the past at all, and most of them just want to sleep around with different guys all the time instead of committing themselves to just only one guy. Most women in the past were very old fashioned and real ladies compared to the very awful ones that are everywhere now unfortunately. Very easy finding love back then compared to nowadays.
Then you are looking in the wrong direction and not towards a Godly woman. There are a lot of strong woman out there, got to change your location of where u are looking. You won’t find any at a bar, or out there “having fun” but you can find someone at a church gathering, or someone at a coffee shop, or places you don’t normally go.
Am impressed over this write-up
More grace, wisdom and knowledge through Christ our Lord. Amen!
For the past 2 years, I have been extremely fortunate to know a woman who meets almost every one of these signs. Currently we are not married and have no kids, but I have no doubt she would be the ideal mother to my children. I believe God has sent her to me.
That’s a great work. Am really blessed Sir, thank you so much, more Grace and Wisdom from above.
GOD BLESS YOU SIR FOR THIS ARTICLE.
Awesome Awesome Awesome !!!! Thank you so very much for taking the time to post this article. Very helpful for a guy who has made lots of mistakes in past relationships but through gods grace and mercy found love once again in life !
Hi
I really enjoyed this article and I am probably to young to even think about marriage but so many teen couples must reed this !!It will change the way teens see love and relationships to such a positive way . Amazing amazing article !
I truly believe I can educate myself threw this and the word of God to improve my relationship and get married eventually to the right person .
God bless.
Thank you so much for this article as a single man of God,It will really help me in my search for the right woman while also being the right man for her.
Thanks for sharing the wisdom. It benefits both men and women, to look for such a wife/woman, better prepared ourselves be the one who could admire such a precious one, don’t forget Godly women find Godly men, right?
How could such a wonderful woman be your wife..this is the most important thing to ask! I will share with my youngest son, he is 18 two months ago, from time to time when he was small I already pray for him a Godly wife, obey our Lord and he will prepare, once again thanks for your reminder.
Ivy
thanks for impactful article. personally i learned a lot both physically and spiritually i believe through applying this truth i will get my right partner. God bless u
Thanks for the collection. I’m unmarried and think choosing a godly wife could be my biggest hope in life and a bad one my biggest fear. A divorced man did tell me that in his story the warning signs were there before he married his ex-wife though. Cool to also have other Christians reading this too (there are very few where I’m from); God bless you all 🙂
As I was reading these, I saw that the woman I believe is for me fits everyone of these. She is defiantly NOT a woman that believes in this modern way of marriage that most Christian women do. She is old fashioned, traditional, and godly woman and truly makes me want to be better and strive to be better, especially in Christ.
You forgot to mention this in your covering of 1 Corinthians 7.
1 Corinthians 7:5 5Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
To many women want to say when and how their husbands can touch them and have sex. This can go along way in making things hard and frustrating. But if she wants it, then we cannot deny her. The verse says that we are to NEVER deprive each other, UNLESS it is agreed on. Then come back alter and get busy. If we are to not have authority over our own bodies, then we should not have the choice to say no if the other wants it.
I know that isn’t a popular thing with the feminists, but we are to live our Christian marriages SEPARATELY from the world, and NOT follow the worlds standards. But tragically, feminism has crept into the church. It ALL needs to be eliminated from Christians.
This is one of the best relationship articles I’ve read in recent times.
I’m particularly glad to see that you gave these insights from the Bible. Thank you so much for this write-up.
God bless your ministry sir.
This is so inspiring. Virtually all of the lists are seen in my lady. Thanks be to God Almighty for making me make the right choice. I love her so much..
Thanks a million for these teaching, I will make good use of it daily to my friends
This is a great article, Thanks.
I have a question: I see all of these signs in my future wife, we love and trust each other a lot and want to get married , but the problem is we are cousins and it is completely fine to marry in our original culture (the middle east) but we live in america and we are afraid what people would say about us when they know we are cousins.
How to know if God wants us to get married?
Thanks
NoI suggest you don’t marry cos you are related by blood and that if you marry I suggest it’s Insest
It is incest to marry blood relations (family, cousins), and if you do so and have children together, there is a substantial likelihood the children will suffer from some form of birth defect, such as permanent nystagmus, faulty neurological system, behavior similar to autism, and the list is lengthy.
This Article is great. 😊
Thank you for this! A great guide to find a right partner in life. As i read this, i feel excited on what will happen next. Excited on what God has prepared for me if this season come. Thank you writer you did a good Job!
How does God reveal if he is the one? I have been in a relationship for 4 years 1/2. He seems to not be sure if I am the partner he wants and sometimes I am not sure. I feel like we both have the qualities to be good partners but how do we know we are good partners for one another? I have asked him to decide if we are going to get married or not because I don’t want to continue a relationship for m.k or years if it’s not heading anywhere. Any suggestions.
A very nice Article.!!
I’m very much glad and motivated with this information. It is really the necessary fundamental marital facts one needs to reinforce himself with before drawing the line of marriage.
I have been careful in marriage decision making cos is always a life time thing. But despite my own personal efforts, i submitted all unto the hands of God because only him knows the best for his own. Most marriages are self bonded outside God’s own plans due the lustful desires of men and not being patience enough to receive from God.
Although by virtue of nature and individual differences, not all women can ride the whole required qualities, but at least 75% of such qualities is expected.
And I believe that LOVE and FEAR OF GOD is the greatest of all the required qualities from a woman to enable her live in obedience and submissiveness to her husband. For it is only God that perfect all things.
I appreciate you Sir for this kind of Article and will be much more glade to work successfully with you.
I read your article sir and I am blessed. And I am more secure to have a godly wife for me in future. I have recently met with a girl, who is pursuing her Bth in Kerala, India. I first saw her and felt like she is worthy of my future life partner but I am still waiting on God to make sure about it. Many times girls came to woo me and even pastors suggested me for many girls but the Holy Spirit somehow guided me and revealed me that they are not. But this girl whom I have met recently is leaving some evidence to be my future life partner but I am still not sure. But I want to share some things that the Lord revealed me. Today she left for Kerala with her uncle and as her told me I did the booking of their flight ticket. And said in my heart if I could see her before her leaving to Kerala and it happened I don’t know how. I went to their residence place for a purpose with my friend who lives in that very place. But I didn’t say anything I just greeted her in the name of Jesus. But today also as they left from bagdogra airport, siliguri , I knew in my heart if she is mine future life partner, her uncle would call me. And it happened as they reached their first terminal in Bengaluru airport, her uncle called ( as she didn’t have my no. ) . This is the sign I sharing with you sir but I’m still not sure she is going to be my future life partner. I am just seeking the will of Lord. Unless He reveals me I will not proceed in this matter. Expect a reply from you sir as my cousel . By the way thanks for your article I blessed by this.
Am so glad to come across such wonderful article, I’ve longing to read sth like this another to find the right man and for me too to know how to work with him. May GOD bless u.
If a man is refusing you to wear sexy clothes most likely he is a controlling bastard.
The advice here should be taken with a pinch of salt. Life is not that black n white.
Listen to your inner impulses and not what a bible thumper here is yapping about.
Agree !
Thank you so much for this awesome post. I am currently passing through a tough time in selecting a right woman for myself as such I have been searching for Godly counsel and my day brightened up the moment I saw your post. I have taken note of the stated points and use them as a benchmark in my persuit. Thank you.
Thank you for writing this. I recently ended a 4 year relationship with a boyfriend. I allowed myself to stay in the relationship even when there were red flags. I thank Jesus for giving me wisdom . Your article comes ata very good time for me to work on myself and wait on God .
dear god can you please make nicholas penaloza back to 11 years old
Am a Lady but seriously I really find this article very lovely, at least it will help me to add to where I was lacking and build myself. God bless you sir. Please sir permit me to ask. If my man is lacking in terms of Spiritual life, how can I go about it? thanks
You are so great, am being inspired by your article am not on the same level. Thanks and may God bless you.