A relationship, whether it is with your wife, husband, girlfriend, or boyfriend, has to be a story of love. And a chronicle of love should bring joy into your heart no matter how difficult life would be. But in this world, that’s not always what happens. Many people are getting hurt than being delighted. Many lovers are wishing to be happier in their own relationship.
If you haven’t been happy enough in your relationship in the past years, there is always a brand new year to look forward to. Maybe your partner was not doing his or her part to make you happy. Possibly, your relationship was against all odds. Or perhaps it’s you who is actually blocking happiness from getting into your heart.
Whatever is causing you to be upset or discontented, here are some ways to be happier in your relationship. If you have not in a relationship yet, you may also read them to get ready this year.
1. Learn to love yourself.
You cannot love your partner if you don’t know how to love yourself. You cannot make her or him happy if you can’t even make yourself happy. Both love and happiness have to start with you. In order to provide them, you have to produce them. Hence, starting today, do not forsake and hurt yourself. Keep it happy, strong. and lovely always.
Love yourself by growing yourself. Start eating healthier this year. Get into fitness activities to gain more physical and mental strength. Have enough rest and sleep. Beautify yourself inside and out. Remember that making yourself a better person doesn’t only make you happy but also make your loved ones happier for you. Why? It’s because they won’t need to be worried about you.
ALSO READ: 40 Ways to Love Yourself
2. Be forgiving.
Keeping hatred and bitterness inside your heart will certainly make you sad and be in pain. To be happier in your relationship this year, learn to forgive. Stop the hatred. Let bygones be bygones and move on with a better life. Remember that when you give forgiveness to others, you also give power to yourself – the power to be happier.
We all make mistakes. We all need forgiveness. If it’s difficult for you to forgive, just remember that we will also need to ask for forgiveness someday for our mistakes. Besides, the Scriptures say that “If you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you” (Matthew 6:14). Hence, be forgiving so you may also be forgiven.
3. Love your enemy.
It’s normal to have fights and disagreements in a relationship. Sometimes, you may even treat your significant other as your enemy rather than a friend. When this happens, it breaks your heart and makes you so sad. So what do you need to do to ease the sadness and the pain?
Yes, love your enemy, especially if the enemy you consider is your partner. When you have arguments and fight, and you consider her or him as your enemy, don’t stop loving. Don’t be vengeful. Continue to take care of your significant other. Continue to love her or him by showing kindness, patience, humility, and forgiveness.
Fight the hatred with love, and you will not lose the joy in your heart.
4. Be a better listener and know your partner better.
When you listen to your partner, it also shows that you love her or him. Imagine if your partner also does it to you? It will also make you happy, isn’t it? Thus, starting this day, try to not talk too much. Have silence and give your partner the opportunity to be heard. Give peace and listen carefully to learn new things about her or him.
Remember that loving is knowing and understanding. The more you listen, the more you know and understand. With more knowledge and understanding, your doubts and insecurities are lessened. And you become happier.
5. Don’t be afraid to be hurt.
If you’re afraid to be hurt, you can never really be happy in a relationship, because your doubts and fear will not go away. You will be anxious and scared to love completely. The love you will give is not pure. You will not enjoy it, your partner will not be happy with it, and your relationship will be unhealthy.
If you want to be happier in your relationship, be fearless. Remember that “the love we give away is the only love we keep” – Elbert Hubbard. Thus, if you want to keep a genuine love, give genuine love. At the end of the day, it’s not the kind of love that you’ve received that will be written in the sky, but it’s the kind of love you have given.
“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” – 1 John 4:18
6. Serve love, not money.
Money is an essential thing for making our lives more comfortable. With money, we can pay our bills, travel to many places, and buy some extra time to spend more quality time with our loved ones. However, it should not be our top priority.
We enter into a relationship not because we want to enjoy financial wealth but we want to cherish love for the poorer or richer. Perhaps, money can buy many things, but it can’t buy the true happiness that loves offers. Couples that fight over money tend to suffer, not only financially but also mentally and emotionally.
If you want a happier relationship, avoid fighting over money while ruining your love for each other. It’s okay to argue when it comes to financial matters, but it should be done in a healthy manner and without destroying your relationship. If money is lost, then let it be as long as your love is preserved.
Never lose your love just because you lose money. You cannot serve both love and money. Let love influence the major decisions in your relationship, not money. Let God, who is love, be the center of your relationship.
7. Celebrate your love with honesty.
Rejoice your love with the truth. With honesty, you can be free. There are no more lies to hide. There is no more guilt to imprison you. The world becomes more comfortable to live for both of you.
The truth may hurt, but it’s only temporary. Once you or your partner accepts the truth, freedom and happiness come alive. On the other hand, you can escape with lies. But when they are uncovered, the damage is permanent.
So if you’re looking forward to a happier relationship this year, start practicing honesty. Remember the following verse in the Bible:
”Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.” – 1 Corinthians 13:6
8. Put your love into action.
If you have many great plans in your relationship but you’re not doing anything to achieve them, that would not make you happy. If you have many promises to your partner but you’re not walking your talk, that would only make the both of you disappointed.
To be happier, you have to love through actions. As faith without deed is dead, love without actions is also nothing. Remember that you can find more happiness in your journey than in your destination. Therefore, if you want to be truly happy in your relationship, let your partner see your love in action.
Start working hard for your love. Walk your talk. If you need to run, run for your love. Whatever you have promised, try your best to deliver it. You can only experience total happiness and satisfaction in your relationship when you realize that you have done everything for your love.
Always remember that whether you succeed or fail in your relationship, as long as you have given your best to show your love, you still have many reasons to be happy. Happiness is not what you receive, it’s what you give. It’s not also what you will get at the end, but it’s what you earn along the way.
Online courses recommended for you:
- Relationship Coaching: Transform Problems into Growth & Love:
Develop true love & greater intimacy & a relationship growth mindset, stop destructive conflicts, find meaning & purpose.
- Love & Connection: The Science of Successful Relationships:
This course will show you how to examine the unknown path that you’ll travel with your spouse, and carefully evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship.
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