It’s always a sweet sight to see old couples who are still enjoying their lives in the comfort of each other’s arms. You couldn’t help but be in awe and astonishment whenever you see a couple celebrating their golden anniversary (others even older), as this means that they have definitely stood the test of time, patience, and faith. And these days, it’s rare to see couples lasting for several years, even when on the outset they were seen to be the strongest pairs ever.
So yes, if you think that your current relationship is the one for keeps, then you must know how to make it last. Below are 8 ways that may help:
1. Communication is key.
Communication is key to any lasting relationship. As a couple, you and your partner have to talk things out, and these include everything, from your joys to your qualms, your issues to your disagreements. You also have to talk about your own personal aspirations, so that you are able to understand each other in different aspects.
Discussing things that involve the both of you and your relationship as a whole is very important, as this keeps your bond alive. You may not agree on everything all the time, but through communication, you are able to channel your opinions in such ways that you come up with a compromise that allows you two to continue life together.
2. Acknowledge each other’s strengths and weaknesses.
Many couples end breaking up because they fail to acknowledge each other’s strengths and weaknesses. They either feel like they are competing against each other, or that either of them is weaker and can be a burden anytime soon. Relationships are not like that. They are not created out of convenience; they are formed out of love, trust, friendship, and respect.
When you are in a relationship, you should be brave enough to accept your partner’s flaws and work your way from there (and vice versa). By doing so, you get to inspire each other into becoming better partners and better individuals, thus allowing your relationship to grow.
3. Get out of the box.
People often think that affairs are the root cause of a couple’s breakup. In some cases, yes, but oftentimes having an affair is just a product of something even darker. Or to put it bluntly, something bland: boredom.
It’s human nature for us to get bored. We get bored of the daily routine, the usual activities, the time to go to bed and the time to wake up. When boredom finally strikes, it leads us to think and do crazy things that shock our partners, sometimes to the point that they feel like they don’t know us anymore. Hence, they leave.
So yes, going out of your usual couple’s routine helps a lot in cheering up your relationship. Surprise each other. Travel to places you’ve never thought about, learn a new skill together, and try different things that intend to spice up your bond. Without the spontaneity and occasional shock value, your relationship will definitely end up in a limbo.
4. Maintain the sweetness.
Sweet nothings always give a breath of fresh air for every couple. It’s because they add color to your dullest days as a couple. And they don’t cost a thing most of the time.
You may want to write a letter to your partner saying how much you love and appreciate their efforts, and give it at a time they least expect it. If you want to be more romantic, you may surprise your significant other with flowers or simple presents even when there’s no occasion to celebrate. But seriously, the simplest actions would do.
5. Respect each other’s “me” time.
One thing about couples these days is that they make it a point to cling together like there’s no tomorrow, and being away from each other brews the opportunity for unnecessary suspicion. If this is how you feel in your relationship, then it’s time to make some major changes.
It is very important to learn to respect each other’s “me” time, because even while you are in a relationship together, you two are still separate, different individuals. Your partner has their own friends and you have yours, each of you have individual dreams to fulfill, but at the end of the day you still choose to hold each other’s hands and face the future together. With that said, don’t wallow over your time apart. Think of it as your time to grow individually, but still together in heart and soul.
6. Touch each other.
Did you know that touching tells a lot more words than mere speaking up? It is because when you hold hands, hug, or kiss, you get to channel your emotions to each other. You immediately know when something is wrong or amiss, and that serves as your queue to communicate. Touching is also a way of comfort, as releases feel-good endorphins every time you give your partner a pat on the shoulder, a squeeze in the hand, or a kiss on the forehead. The feeling of assurance brought about by touching is powerful enough to heal wounds brought by harsh words and arguments you’ve had with your significant other earlier during the day.
7. Avoid the blame game.
Blaming each other for things that have gone wrong is a catalyst for breakup. This is because there’s no need to find faults in each other for the sole reason that you two are in this together. Hence, whatever takes place in your relationship, good or bad, is a product of both your actions.
Rather, you may want to talk things out with your partner and see the brighter side of things. Discuss your takeaways and lessons learned from what you think are mistakes and mishaps, and find ways to compromise. This way, it would be easier to solve problems, not only because you agreed on roles and responsibilities, but because you are resolving them on the basis of trust.
Lastly, when working towards a long lasting relationship, you should be always willing to listen. You not only hear your partner’s voice, but pay attention to every detail. It is because when you listen, you not just take into account your partner’s side, you provide time, patience, and the heart to understand where they are coming from.
By listening you learn what’s in your partner’s heart, and they learn what’s in yours. You two then find ways on how to improve your relationship, slowly but surely, through the years.
Making it for keeps is probably the primary goal of every couple. It wouldn’t be surprising to know if this is also your ultimate relationship goal, because who wouldn’t want love to last a lifetime, right? And mind you, it’s not an impossible dream. All you have to do is know how to do it right.