Are you one of those strong and independent women who are afraid to commit to a relationship because they think they can’t have a good relationship while staying independent? Then, you’re wrong. You can actually be an independent woman and a great girlfriend at the same time. The key is balance. In fact, staying independent while in a relationship is one of the secrets of maintaining a healthy relationship.
Here are some ways for you to stay independent in a relationship.
1. Have me time.
Being in a relationship doesn’t mean giving up your alone time. Everyone needs to spend some quiet time alone and be refreshed. Hence, never ever be guilty of visiting your favorite bookstore alone. Read your favorite book. Listen to your favorite songs. Visit your favorite chill spot in town. Drink a cup of tea. Do whatever makes you feel happy and recharged. Remember that it’s healthy for both of you to have some personal space and time. Spending some time away from each other will just spice up your relationship.
2. Keep doing the things that you love.
For you to stay independent in a relationship, don’t forget to keep doing the things that you love. Keep your love for art. Take photographs. Continue painting. Write poems and stories. Do a cover of your favorite song. Attend a concert of your favorite artist. Travel. Make sure that you make time for your own passions in life. A good relationship means you are still able to keep your own interests and hobbies while being together with your partner.
3. Find a new hobby.
While it’s a good thing that you have some shared interests with your partner, it’s still important for you to find a new hobby. Why don’t you try yoga? Never went for a hike? Then, go on a hike. Be a volunteer. Channel your inner creativity by enrolling in a calligraphy class. Make yourself exposed to new things in order for you to continue discovering things about yourself, enjoy life outside of the relationship, and get some new perspectives.
4. Don’t be afraid to speak up.
One of the characteristics of a real independent person is speaking his or her mind. Hence, if you have some concerns in your relationship, don’t hesitate to speak up. You have the right to disagree with your partner. You have the right to voice out your opinions, and you deserve to get heard. Point out what your partner did wrong. Speak about what made you disappointed or mad with your partner.
However, make sure that you stay calm while expressing your thoughts. Stay rational. Talk when you’re not enveloped with anger. Talk about ways on how you can improve your relationship. Always speak up, and stay open-minded.
5. Never give up your own values.
Being committed to your partner doesn’t mean giving up your core values. In fact, your partner should respect these values. You are also expected to respect his or her own values. You can compromise, but think of what you’re only willing to compromise. Don’t ever be forced into doing something that’s out of your will. Your partner should know the things that are most important to you. Also, if your partner truly loves you, you don’t have to fight for your values because he or she will accept them. Your partner will embrace who you are.
6. Hold on to your dreams.
Just because you’re partners doesn’t mean you will make his dreams your dreams. You have your own dreams, so go chase them. Keep working hard for your own dreams. Of course, this doesn’t mean that you will not support your partner with his or her own dreams. You can still support each other while striving to make each other’s dreams come true.
7. Spend time with your friends.
Just because you’ve found happiness in your boyfriend doesn’t mean you will forget your friends. Show your independence by spending quality time with your friends. Nurture your relationship with them. Continue enjoying life with them. Learn from them. Life is not just about you and your partner. Also, if your partner really loves you, he or she will even be grateful to your friends for making you happy and will love to get to know them more.
8. Keep loving yourself.
One of the most important ways to stay independent in a relationship is to love yourself. Loving your partner doesn’t mean you will stop loving yourself. You still need to count yourself as one of your priorities. Love your own imperfections. Remember that an independent woman will not let her insecurities beat her down. You are beautiful just the way you are, so embrace and love yourself.
9. Be yourself.
In addition, never be sorry for being you. Your partner needs to respect you for what and who you are. Are you the career type of person? Then, he should support you. He should be proud of you. He’s even lucky to have such an independent woman to be called as his partner, so continue to be yourself. Sometimes, you may find it hard to adjust to each other’s differences. However, remember that you don’t have to change yourself for your partner. You don’t have to change for anyone.
10. Keep improving yourself.
Being yourself doesn’t mean you will not seek self-improvement. You still need to continue being a better version of yourself. Hence, try to set short term and long term goals. Learn from your mistakes. Listen to your friends’ pieces of advice. Listen to your partner. By improving yourself, you won’t find it hard to be a better partner as well.
Indeed, it’s possible to remain a strong and independent person while keeping a happy and healthy relationship with your partner. Of course, it will not be easy. In fact, it takes constant effort, understanding, and a great deal of maturity between the two of you to make the relationship work. However, your partner should never be intimidated or threatened by your independence. It is something that should be celebrated, so never lose yourself. Stay strong and independent, ladies.
ALSO READ: 11 Tips to be Yourself in a Relationship
Online courses recommended for you:
- Relationship Coaching: Transform Problems into Growth & Love:
Develop true love & greater intimacy & a relationship growth mindset, stop destructive conflicts, find meaning & purpose. - Love & Connection: The Science of Successful Relationships:
This course will show you how to examine the unknown path that you’ll travel with your spouse, and carefully evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship.
I always give too much love & ultimately the person gets scared & moves away from me. That’s so unfair to me. I bend backwards to make you feel happy & you dump me
I learned soooo much out of it! Thanks for sharing and I wish you a lot of happiness and succes 🥰