16 Ways to Move On When You Still Love Your Ex

walk and move on
Photo by Aleksandr Ledogorov

Letting go of someone you still love is hard to do. You cannot imagine living your life without that person in it. This is why there are people who snap because of too much depression, lose the will to live a productive life, or worst, commit suicide.

However, the fact that you are reading this blog means you want to fight off the pain, move on, and continue living your life. That is a good thing. It may be a hard journey, but at least you are on your way to moving on.

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16 Ways to Move On When You Still Love Your Ex

Here are 16 ways that will help you move even if you still love your ex.

1. Do your best to fight for your love.

If you love the person, a friend once told me, fight for him/her as hard as you can—until you get tired of fighting. Being prideful, I found it foolish. However, I realized she was right. If you really love the person, do not give up on him/her immediately. No matter how stupid it seems, fight for your love. You may fail in getting him/her back, but at least you know you have done your best to save your relationship. This will help you avoid regrets in the future.

2. Accept that s/he is gone.

If fighting for your ex does not bring him/her back, you have to proceed to the next step: acceptance. Since there is nothing you can do to restore your relationship, you have to accept the reality that it is all over. Denying this fact would not help you a bit. That is why you need to condition your mind that s/he is not coming back.

ALSO READ: 14 Signs Your Ex is Over You and Doesn’t Want You Back

3. Think that if you are meant to be, s/he will come back someday.

This is different from holding on. You open yourself to possibilities. To make it easier for you to accept that s/he is gone, believe that someday you will get back together if the two of you are meant to end up with each other. Leave everything to destiny—that is your only hope, whether you like it or not, because you already did your part and nothing happened.

4. Let go of memories and the things that remind you of him/her.

I know this is hard to do, but if you are serious about forgetting the person, you need to courageously let go of everything that connects you, including the memories. Stop reminiscing about your good times together because it would only hurt a lot. Return his/her things, throw or burn those s/he gave you unless keeping them does not affect you much.

ALSO READ: 8 Tips to Let Go of the Past and Move Forward to a Better Life

5. Direct your focus to other important areas in your life.

Life is not all about love and romance. That means you can still live even if you have no boyfriend/girlfriend. Divert your attention to other areas such as career and personality development. Look at how many career-oriented people set aside romance so they can focus on becoming successful. Maybe this kind of perspective can suit you for now.

Ways to Move On When You Still Love Your Ex
Photo by Mohamed_hassan

6. Deactivate your social media in the meantime.

One of the temptations of brokenhearted people is stalking their ex. Admit it, you cannot resist the urge of checking the social media accounts of your ex because you miss him/her. You want to know how s/he is doing and if s/he gives away any hint of missing you too. How can you move on, then? To avoid this, decide to go on online hiatus for months or until such time you can resist the temptation already.

7. Stop communicating with his/her family or friends.

You might keep on reaching out to your ex’s relatives or friends, hoping the contact can help you stay close to him/her. It is like asking for reinforcement from them to help you get back together. However, if your ex gets mad knowing about it, then it is a sign you need to stop. Plus, you only make it hard for you to forget him/her.

8. Find someone you can talk to about your feelings.

Having someone who would patiently listen to your whines and cries even if you are only talking about the same thing is therapeutic. At this point, you need less advice. What you need is a listening ear so you can express your feelings without judgment. Find a family member or friend whom you can trust and who understands what you are going through.

9. Do not rush moving on.

I know you want to forget the pain as soon as possible, but it does not happen that way. Be patient with yourself. The more you try to move on faster, the harder it gets. You cannot force a wound to heal fast, right? The moment you think it has healed because it already dried up and you peel its skin, blood comes out again.

10. Avoid being alone.

Depression is a common effect of heartbreak—and you probably know how it can be devastating. To avoid getting depressed or to overcome it, always surround yourself with people. If you are staying in your own place alone, find a friend to stay with you for a while, or if possible, go home to your family. They will surely understand.

ALSO READ: 16 Ways How Not to Be Sad All the Time

11. Be physically active.

I have been repeating this in my other blogs—you should engage in physical activities. Do regular exercise or find a sport you can enjoy. Aside from the enjoyment, which helps you forget about your pain for the moment, it will help your body release endorphin—a pain reliever hormone.

Ways to Move On When You Still Love Your Ex
Photo by Free-photos

12. focus on other people important to you.

Your ex is not the only person you love. You still have your family and friends. Just direct your effort and care to these people. They are the ones who stay with you at this hard time, so they deserve to be treated special. Spend time with them, especially your family.

13. Focus on loving yourself.

Aside from your family and friends, you, yourself, deserve your love as well. Instead of thinking you are unlovable because your ex left you, be the first one to encourage yourself. Eat healthily, get enough sleep, and avoid stress so that you will stay fit. Pamper yourself and be attractive—not for anyone else but yourself.

14. Find a new passion.

Romance is not the only thing that can keep you passionate. Discover your talents and interests. Use this opportunity to find what you are good at. Maybe you can have a new hobby like painting or playing instruments. Focus your thoughts and energy on it so that you will feel productive. This will help you avoid depression.

15. Be happy for your ex.

If you still love your ex, it means you have to be selfless about his/her happiness. Even if it hurts, pray for him/her to be happy in the new chapter of his/her life—even if without you. Love is not self-seeking. You should want the best for the person you love, even if it is a sacrifice on your part.

16. Consciously decide to be happy.

There are bad circumstances you cannot stop from happening because you cannot control everything. However, you can do something about your response to what happens around you. Therefore, instead of allowing depression and loneliness to suffocate you, strengthen your will to decide to be happy. As the cliché goes, happiness is a choice. Decide to look at the bright side always. It is easier said than done, but it is not impossible.

ALSO READ:

There is life after a breakup.

There are still other things you can do even if you have lost the person you love. Do not allow the pain to stop you from living. Live for those who constantly love you. Live to pursue your dreams. Live for yourself.

Online courses recommended for you:

Books recommended for you:

Gift ideas for yourself:

ALSO READ:

14 Signs Your Ex Still Loves You and Wants You Back

14 Ways to Stay Friends with Your Ex After a Breakup

10 Reasons Why You Can’t Move On From Your Ex

Cyril Abello
Cyril is a personal development blogger and content writer. She is also an online language teacher. She has a degree in Communication Arts and loves everything about writing. Being a full-time mom, she enjoys freelancing.

108 thoughts on “16 Ways to Move On When You Still Love Your Ex”

  1. Me and my ex bf broke up for almost 3 months now but we still communicate. He doesn’t want to be with me anymore. He also said its his fault at the 1st place to get into a relationship with me and we dont have the same religion also. He broke up with me, feel inlove with another girl and have moved on. But these months he said he misses me the everything that we did. We still do communicate up until now but as friends. His also very confused in his mind right now and I am also confused if I should continue the talking stage or not?

    Reply
    • Hi Girl,
      I can relate to you big time.

      My answer to your question would be a definite: NO!!!
      I am speaking from experience and I’ve also learnt a lot about this FROM MEN!

      I think you should consider, that guys are hunters by nature. This doesn’t mean that they are bad, and the only thing they want is sex. No!
      But it does mean, that the more available you are, the less interested they become because you are easy prey. And easy preys are not precious.

      The more distance you maintain, the more they will want you and will want to “hunt you down”.

      However, in your case, there’s another girl in the picture too, and he also admitted, that it was his fault to get into a relationship with you. On top of that, you have different religions too.

      If I were you, I would work on moving on as fast as I could.

      I wish you all the best!
      Feel free to contact me if you need more help. I’ll be happy to share my experiences and knowledge with you. No catch or anything.

      Blessings,

      Judy

      Reply
  2. Hey trust me rebound relationships hardly last and if all goes well u might work out things together and better your new relationship compared to the last time

    Reply
  3. Hi,
    Thank you so much for tips,
    I was in relationship for 5years with a married woman and she has 2 kids as well. Even I’m married and having 2 kids too.
    We both were not happy in our married life.
    This month we have ended our relationship as she was not ready to marry me and I wanted to marry her.
    I came to know many things during this 4 years about her past and friends which I use to tell her not to be in touch with them. Now it’s too hard for me to come out of this pain. Please help me

    Reply
  4. My boyfriend left me for no reason and him and I have been dating since 2016 I met a lot of his friends so I feel better that I have someone to talk to but I was broken hearted so much that I was depressed for a over 2 months but today I have a new boyfriend that sings to me and i’m still a little sad but I will get over it someday 🙂

    Reply
  5. I once been loved by a girl and nothing is wrong with that. I knew exactly how you feel cause I’m now that someone she used to love. It’s been months but I still love and miss her deeply. You will be alright and trust that one day you will find the one you truly deserve.

    Reply
  6. Greetings..its my first timr reading this…its because all along i have told myself am strong but right i realise i am not..am dating a guy three years older than me..when he approached me,he told me he was single and i believed him..along the way i discovered there was someone else i kept quiet then after three months i asked him about and yeah my fears were confirmed..he tells me she came after me but i believe she was there when i came into the picture..now am caught up in between keeping him or letting him go because knowing there is someone else just breaks my spirit. But thank you for the encouragement:)

    Reply
  7. I don’t know what’s she wants, been married for 10 years, separated for last 8 months. I want back but she don’t want me now. We got 2 kids and just now spending Christmas together. She saying is doing that only for kids and pretend to be happy family. Not giving me any attention. Is she using me or there is something left? I’m getting crazy, don’t know what to do?

    Reply
  8. My bf left me but I still love him the worst is that the guys that r coming for me now I dont have feelings for any of them my ex is still in my mind but I need to forget him and move on

    Reply
  9. Hello, I’m so heartbroken my ex left me 9 weeks ago but Been playing head games with me since saying he loves me and wants me but needs to be alone, I feel like I’m grieving and he’s died it’s hurting that much, never loved before I can’t eat or sleep keep wondering what is he doing or who with, we lost a baby in April I had mmc at 12 weeks so I’ve been heartbroken since then but now I’ve lost my baby soulmate and boyfriend it’s killer me! The thought of him moving on and being with anyone else knocks me sick! How can I over come all of this I’ve had loads of card readings all day different so I don’t know what to believe

    Reply
  10. I have been dating my boyfriend for three years now. And now he is not serious with me anymore and doesnt wanna be commited to me. He has hurt me a lot in these three years..he keeps ignoring me.. we have done everything together…wheneva he needs anything from me he is very sweet but otherwise he doesnt give a damn about me. I feel really hurt and painful right now..i dont knw what to do anymore as i have tried to do everything i can from my side…literally everything….i still love him so much…even now he is ignoring my messages and not replying and not telling if he wants to be with me not..if he doesnt wanna be with me he can just breakup na..he is not even telling that and putting me on the dark side…..i feel very very sad and hurt…. please i need a therapisy who can help me overcome this pain cuz i get panic attacks and i feel really empty..i dont feel like waking up in the morning… i have sleepless nights..this feeling is horrible..please someone help me

    Reply
  11. Two days ago, we ended things between us. We’ve been long distance for 5 months now because he is in the army. I was originally planning of letting him go while we are apart, however, when I called him to talk about it, everything backfired to me. I asked him who I am to him. I told him how I no longer feel secure with him and that he changed. But turns out he still high hopes for us, however, my lack of confidence with what we have made him decide that we should just end it. Now I can’t accept it. I really love this guy. After knowing that are feelings for each other are still there, I don’t want to end it anymore. I just want to wait for him to go home. However, our bigger problem now is we are always going to be long distance one way or another. I am still studying and I can’t just move my life for him. I can’t just leave my family and my whole life for us to be in one place. I want us to work. I am still not ready to let him go because I feel like we haven’t had our chance to really express what we feel for each other. We’ve only been physically together for one month because he had to leave for his military training after that. He is my first. I am really having a difficult time right now. I want us to work. I want us to make a compromise then after I finish my school, I can move with him or he can also find a job in our own province. My heart feels like it’s going to explode. How do I move on from this? Can we still make this work?

    Reply
  12. This is what i needed to see that im not the only one… I still love n want him back so its been almost a month now .. Jus going to c where life takes my heart now if he comes back or doesn’t it hurts so much but i know ill get thru this

    Reply
  13. He left me…..I did all I could…….we weren’t dating but we act as one…..we do everything together….I send him lots of my nudes……the first time he left….he was hearth broken by the girl…..he came back to me….and …..for d second time he has left me again…..am not so my self…..please I need an online therapist

    Reply

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