Most people believe that breakups are the easiest way out especially if they’re going through a painful stage in their relationships. Some of them think that in order to avoid the hurt and suffering of the present, they have to say goodbye before it’s already too late. While this kind of mentality seems practical, it’s actually one of the reasons why we lose the chance to be truly happy with the person meant for us.
Easily giving up on something just because it’s hard and sometimes painful will not help you find true happiness in a relationship. Just like how the famous line goes, nothing good comes easy. You have to take on a lot of obstacles first before you can finally get what you have always deserved: true love and a genuinely happy relationship with someone who is courageous enough to face it all.
The point is, it’s unfair to give up on love just because you can’t handle the challenges thrown at you. If you think you don’t have the strength and the faith to keep going, read on.
Here are some of the ways that you can do to save your relationship from a breakup.
1. Be humble and don’t let pride get in the way.
It’s the first step to fix something broken. Humility can make a big difference especially if you no longer think that you can still save your relationship – but how?
First of all, admitting that you have done something wrong or having your partner accept that he did not do his part can change everything. Being humble means being open to the fact that both of you are not perfect, that one needs to apologize for something they did, whether it is intentional or not.
2. Have the courage and strength to speak out.
Don’t just keep your thoughts to yourself. You both have to establish an honesty zone where you agree to talk about the things that really matter, especially the issues that are causing your relationship to fall apart.
Communication is important in any kind of relationship but talking is not enough. You also need to listen sincerely, with the intention of understanding and not criticizing.
3. Don’t just forget and forgive – ask why it happened.
It’s good to talk and forgive someone for something that they did, but it’s also important that you both learn from the experience. Ask yourselves how it happened and what led to such a painful stage in your relationship.
Trying to understand the situation will help prevent it from happening again. It’s also a process of creating a closure so that you can both move on from it.
4. Express your thoughts as clearly as you can.
Learn how to communicate your thoughts but make sure that you’re using the right words and the most appropriate expressions. Make sure that you’re dealing with it as constructively as possible and not adding additional damage to an already breaking bond.
Be sensitive and be clear about the things that hurt. Your end goal should be to fix whatever is broken and not to make it worse.
5. Don’t go out finding faulty remedies.
Don’t go away on your own; trying to find some remedies that can only add fuel to the fire.
If you really want to save your relationship, you won’t go experimenting and finding sources of temporary and often faulty remedies that could further hurt your partner’s feelings. Going out drinking, being with another person, or even just partying with your friends just to forget the pain can do more harm than good.
6. Give each other space and respect their silence.
While some time off can do more harm than good, it’s essential to acknowledge the role of freedom and distance to give you space and time to just breathe.
Respect each other’s silence especially after an emotionally exhausting period in your relationship. Give each other the time to think about what you really want and what you want to do about the situation.
7. Don’t rely on other people to solve your issues.
Your friends and family can make you feel better but it doesn’t mean that you have to depend on them all the time. Remember that the decision should only come from you and you’re the only one who can solve the issues in your relationship. Your decisions should be based on how you feel and not on other people’s judgment.
Yes, your loved ones just want to help but there are things about your relationship that only you can understand.
8. Take all the time that you need to think and heal.
Take your time and don’t be in a hurry to fix it. If it’s true love, you never have to rush a decision.
Someone who truly loves you will wait for you no matter how long – and if they give up on your relationship that easily, then you know that they don’t deserve you. It’s not your loss.
9. Think of what could happen if you end it all.
Can you imagine a future without this person? Sometimes, having a glimpse of the possibilities can help you understand if the decision that you’re about to make is the right one.
Think of what could happen if you say goodbye to this special soul – do you think you can move on from them? Do think that you can have a happier life without them in it? Are you ready to wake up in the morning without them by your side?
10. Finally, ask yourself this question: am I just being selfish?
What if you’re just hurt and you want to end the relationship just to hurt them back? What if you are actually the reason why your relationship doesn’t work? What if it’s you who needs to change?
Understand yourself more and consider the possibility that maybe, just maybe, you’re about to lose someone so special just because you’re being selfish.
Breaking up with someone is the easiest part but it’s the regret that eventually shatters your heart into pieces. Most relationships are worth fighting for and sometimes, we are just too scared to hold on. However, the only way to be genuinely happy is to accept that relationships will never be perfect.
You’ll have your ups and downs but it doesn’t mean that it will stay that way forever. Have a little faith and trust that you can and you will have your own happy ending.
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